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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29088534">broken promises and lost dream (sometimes it's all just meant to be)</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/itsagamefortwo/pseuds/itsagamefortwo'>itsagamefortwo</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Julie and The Phantoms (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>(minimal and nothing explicit), (ok so there's a better explination on the actual era at the start), (only rose), (ray is a lil ooc but someone had to take a hit ://), Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Alternate Universe - Historical, Alternate Universe - Royalty, Arranged Marriage, Blood and Injury, Canonical Character Death, F/M, Gen, Mutual Pining, Slow Burn, Swearing, Weapons, feelin' kinda excited about this one my loves</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-30</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-04-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 11:49:10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>36,754</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29088534</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/itsagamefortwo/pseuds/itsagamefortwo</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>princess julieta has known all her life that she would one day have to marry, she'd just always believed in the promise her parents made her that it would be her choice. when she is told a marriage to the prince of stornoway has been arranged for her julieta realises a prison of fine silks and pretty words is still a prison. so, on impulse, she runs away. it's a long way to willowmarrae, but with new friends and unexplored freedom julieta feels ready for just about anything. </p><p>[<b> it's a runaway royalty au that no one asked for but im having a blast writing anyway</b> ]<br/><i>“Of course. It shall be a long engagement, to allow you go get to know him a little first. I’m sure with time you will grow to love him.”</i><br/><i>Julieta stills in his arms, the words spinning around in her head. ‘A long engagement’. ‘Grow to love him’. She was still to marry a stranger. </i><br/><i>“I don’t– You mean I’m still to marry him? I have no say in it?”</i><br/><i>“Of course you are still to marry him. The arrangement has been made, I cannot go back on my word now.”</i></p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Alex Mercer &amp; Julie Molina &amp; Luke Patterson &amp; Reggie Peters, Alex Mercer &amp; Luke Patterson &amp; Reggie Peters (Julie and The Phantoms), Alex Mercer/Willie (Julie and The Phantoms), Flynn &amp; Julie Molina, Julie Molina/Luke Patterson, Minor or Background Relationship(s)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>145</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>169</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>ok so wee disclaimer on the time period here. its definitely 1800's vibes, but also kinda a more progressive view on women?? my best way of describing it is –– the 2018 robin hood and 2017 king arthur, where it's clearly set in medieval times but also feels like it's going through the industrial revolution? so basically im asking you to use your suspension of disbelief skills on the actual time period and just enjoy pretty dresses and the boys in billowy white shirts.</p><p>based on <a href="https://tangledstarlight.tumblr.com/post/641232635075706880">THIS</a> tumblr prompt, be warned it will probably give a big spoiler</p><p><b><i>trigger warnings!!</i></b> swearing and mentions of roses' death.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p> </p><p></p><blockquote>
  <p>
    <strike>
      <em>once upon a time there was a princess who loved her family and her kingdom, but there were no dragons for her to fight or music for her to play or true love to risk her life for, so she ran away...</em>
    </strike>
  </p>
</blockquote><hr/><p><em>Once upon a time</em>.</p><p>That’s how all the stories she had read growing up began. <em>Once upon a time there was a prince who wished for freedom. Once upon a time there was a farm girl who dreamt of a better life. Once upon a time there was a wolf who ate grandmothers.</em> Stories about people much younger than her going on grand adventures and falling in love and saving the day. Julieta had always loved those stories. Had always <em>longed</em> for one of her own.</p><p>She remembers it was a little game she would play with her mother or her father or even her governess when she was young. Creating her own fairytale with her in the titular role.</p><p><em>Once upon a time there was a princess who loved her kingdom so much she fought a dragon to save them. </em>But dragons weren’t real and it wasn’t her job to save the kingdom.</p><p><em>Once upon a time there was a princess who loved music so very much and would make her kingdom proud every time she played. </em>But music was a hobby and a princess had better ways of making her kingdom proud.</p><p><em>Once upon a time there was a princess who longed for true love and a happily ever after. </em>But while a princess could wish for many things, true love was apparently not one many were granted in real life.</p><p>Each time her role was shot down she conjured a new one, too young to even question why she shouldn’t be allowed to save her kingdom or follow her dreams or find happiness on her own.</p><p>In a way, Julieta had always known that she would have to get married to someone she didn’t know one day. It was just a piece of information she had always been told, had accepted and stored away but never really understood. (She understands it now, understands and hates and denies it.)</p><p>She knew that maybe, if she was lucky, it would be to someone she vaguely knew from various balls and social gatherings. If she was <em>extremely </em>lucky her parents might even let her help decide. But even if she wasn’t lucky, she was still going to be stuck in an arranged marriage. There was no room for true love in her life. It was <em>expected </em>of her, to marry someone she didn’t know, as her governess was want to say.</p><p><em>“As the princess, everyone will watch with pride as you marry a foreign prince. Your future children might even be Kings!” </em> She always said it with a smile, like it was the greatest honour, to be the mother of a future king. And when Julieta had been younger it <em>had</em> sounded like an honour, a big responsibility that she’d gladly take on if it meant people would be proud of her. (She liked it when people were proud of her, sue her.)</p><p>It wasn’t until she was seven and her little brother was born and everyone had started calling him a ‘little King’ and talking about how he’d make a great ruler one day. Which she’d found weird, because he was only a few months old and could barely hold his own head up, how did they know he was going to be great at anything? As far as Julieta could tell all Carlos was good at was spitting up on his clean clothes.</p><p>She’d frowned down at him one day in his crib, chubby hands reaching for her curls as she hung over the wooden bars. He giggled every time she moved her head, curls bouncing away, like it was some sort of game. <em>This </em>was who everyone thought was going to be a great King?</p><p>“Why does Carlos get to be King? What if <em>I</em> wanted to be King?” She asks her mother, holding her upper body up by bracing her arms along the bars, feet dangling a little off the ground. Even now, so many years later, Julieta can remember the sad sort of smile that her mother had given her. She hadn’t understood it at the time, but she thinks she does now.</p><p>“Get off of there before you hurt yourself,” she admonishes first before patting the empty space on the chaise lounge next to her and Julieta doesn’t hesitate to drop to the floor, Carlos’ wide eyes following every movement.</p><p>“You can’t be King sweet girl,” her mother says, brushing a hand over Julieta’s curls as she frowns, a question on the tip of her tongue, but her mother is speaking again before she gets the chance. “Only a man can be King. A lady can be a Queen, but a Queen isn’t allowed to rule alone.”</p><p>Julieta had frowned even more, letting her eyes wander around the nursery room, bouncing from the windows to Carlos’ crib to her dolls house to the neatly ordered books. She hadn’t really understood what her mother meant then, hadn’t seen the sad look in her eyes, hadn’t noticed the way her lips silently formed the word ‘yet’.</p><p>“So I can’t be in charge?” Was the conclusion Julieta had come to.</p><p>“Not unless you marry a very kind man who doesn’t mind you bossing him around,” her mother had teased, fingers wiggling into her sides and Julieta had let out a string of giggles.</p><p>“I only want to marry someone as kind as papa!” Julieta had declared, breaking free of her mothers tickling fingers and huffing breaths, but smiling.</p><p>“Is that to be your first order of rule if you were in charge?”</p><p>“Yes!”</p><p>“Very well then my sweet Julie. When the time comes for you to marry you will get to choose who he is, so that you know he is kind,” and then she had tapped her on the nose, Julieta remembers, with her kind smile that no one else got to see quite like her, and later that night at dinner, her mother had told her father her first royal decree. He had laughed soft and kind, and smiled at her like her mother had, and agreed. Had promised.</p><p>It’s that memory that comes back to her now. Of the three of them sitting around this same table, her mother recounting the day and her father agreeing she’d get to decide who she married and baby Carlos asleep in his crib.</p><p>There’s still three of them at the table. But now her mothers chair is empty and Carlos is sitting opposite her and there’s no laughter tonight.</p><p>“I'm sorry, I'm going to have to ask you to repeat what you just said?” The words leave Julieta’s mouth before she can stop them and she’s never been more thankful for her father insisting they eat their evening meals as a family privately. No guards or servants. Just the three of them, so there was no one around to judge her lapse in manners as her fork clatters to her plate.</p><p>Her father lets out a sigh, gently putting his own cutlery down. Carlos, to his credit, doesn’t say anything, but she can see his eyes pinging between them.</p><p>“Julieta,” her father starts and she already knows she’s going to hate what follows, “We all knew this day would come. I’ve put it off for as long as I can, there was some leeway after– after your mother. But it can’t be avoided any longer. It’s time for you to be married. Arrangements are already being made.”</p><p>The stinging reminder of her mother barely registers as the rest of his words settle in her mind and Julieta simply stares at him. She can hear her heart beating, can feel the stitching on her skirt rubbing against her palms from how hard she has gripped the material in her attempt to not slam her hands on the table.</p><p>“But–” she breathes out, eyes roaming over her fathers face, “you <em>promised</em> I would get to choose.”</p><p>He had made that promise in this very room. It was the one thing that had made knowing she would have to marry for the kingdom bearable. For years, it had been her comfort. To know that she would have some say in the decision.</p><p>Until she uttered those words he had been holding eye contact with her, but he breaks it now, looking down at his table as he lets out another sigh.</p><p>“Promises made to a seven year old can’t dictate your future, or the future of this kingdom. A match has been made with the Prince of Stornoway. By all accounts he’s a charming young man, pleasant to look at. I’m sure he’s kind as well.”</p><p>But Julieta had stopped listening. All she can hear is a roaring in her ears as she shakes her head slowly at him, disbelief and anger and sadness all at war within her.</p><p>“You <em><strong>promised</strong></em>,” is all she can say, and she blinks back tears that threaten to fall. Crying right now will not help her case, will not show that she should be allowed to make this most <em>important </em>decision that will affect her life forever.</p><p>“Not all promises can be kept,” he looks at her again now and Julieta sees that there is no arguing with him. He’s made <em>his </em>decision on the matter. “As my daughter I hope you will come to see this is the right choice. As the Princess of this kingdom I will order you to agree if I must.”</p><p>Julieta pushes back from the table, relishes in the sound of the chair legs scraping across the stone and hopes it leaves a mark.</p><p>“Then you will have to <em>order </em>me because I will never agree. Mother would be ashamed of you,” it’s a low blow, and one that she doesn’t stick around to see hit. Turning on her heel Julieta leaves the room in a whirl of skirts and clicking of heels. She can hear Carlos calling her name from the doorway but he doesn’t come after her so she can only imagine that their father called him back to the table. None of it really registers with her, all she can focus on is putting one foot in front of the other as she walks quickly through the quiet hallways of the castle, head held high as she struggles to hold back her tears. She can cry when she is in her rooms and the door is locked. By some miracle or chance of fate, she doesn’t encounter anyone and it’s only when her back is pressed against her door, breathing heavy that she realises she might have run.</p><p>One hand pressed to her lips and the other clutching at the material at her waist, Julieta stumbles to her bed swallowing back a choked sob, but she can no longer hold back the tears and lets them fall.</p><p>//</p><p>Waking up the next morning it takes Julieta a moment to remember why her eyes are sore and why she’s still wearing her dress from last night and why her heart feels heavy in her chest. There’s a moment, when she can hear the birds outside her window and servants in the hall outside, where she thinks maybe she’d just had a bad dream.</p><p>And then it all comes crashing back into her mind. The dinner, her fathers words, <em>her </em>words, storming out of the room, crying herself to sleep.</p><p>A small part of her thought that perhaps she was being over dramatic last night, that she was making too big of a deal out of a twelve year old broken promise, had thought that maybe in the light of a new day she’d feel different. But she doesn’t. In fact, as she sits up in her bed, skirts tangled in her legs and pins from her hair digging into her scalp, she almost feels worse about it.</p><p>Julieta knows that there are worse things in life than an arranged marriage. That there are some in their kingdom who struggle to make enough money to feed their families, that some work all their lives for things that she takes for granted, that many people lost loved ones in the sickness that spread through the lands three years ago and are still struggling to recover.</p><p>She knows it makes her privileged that the biggest fault in her life is being told she is to marry a stranger. But her papa had <em>promised</em>. And he had never broken a promise to her before. Which was perhaps the part that hurt so much. A broken promise. That it was the King who had broken it and not her father. She didn’t know if that made it better or worse.</p><p>There’s a knock on her door that stops her from examining the thought further.</p><p>“Princess?” There’s a pause where Julieta wonders if she can get away with not answering, but she’s mad at her father, not the servants just trying to do their jobs. Standing up she brushes down her skirts and tries to pull stray pins from her hair as she walks over the door, turning the lock and only opening it wide enough to poke her head out. Lucinda, her lady-in-waiting stands on the other side, one foot tapping impatiently on the ground and Julieta immediately regrets opening the door.</p><p>Maria, her cousin on her mothers side, had been her lady-in-waiting before Lucinda, they’d always been friends first, ranking only coming into play when they were outside of the castle. And then she gotten married three months ago, to a very lovely young noble who she was quite taken with. Julieta had been overjoyed for them, and still was, but she couldn’t help be a little bitter over it all. Especially when it was announced that Maria would be leaving court and Julieta would be getting a new lady-in-waiting. Lucinda. Who wasn’t interested in being friends and just wanted to advance her place in life.</p><p>“Will you be joining us in the gardens for breakfast today or would you like it brought to your rooms?” She made no comment on her hair or her eyes, which Julieta was sure were still red. Always straight to business. If Lucinda was asked to marry a stranger she’d probably have no issues with it, Julieta thought bitterly.</p><p>“I shall be down shortly, please give my apologies,” Julieta smiled sweetly at her and waited only long enough for a nod of confirmation before shutting the door again, leaning heavily against the wood as she let out a sigh. The last thing she wanted was to sit at another table with her family, plus whatever nobles had decided to pay a visit today.</p><p>But she couldn’t avoid him forever and if there were other people around he couldn’t really bring up the subject lest he wanted to start a fight. If she could get through breakfast, avoid him the rest of the day, it would give her time to come up with a compelling argument against the marriage. With that rough plan in mind, Julieta nodded to herself once, rang for a servant and began to get dressed.</p><p>The second she sat down at the table, Julieta knew she’d been wrong and wanted to blame it on her being tired and emotional distress. Carlos shot her a wide eyed look as she began piling fruit on her plate but she didn’t see it for the warning it was until too late when the Lady next to her struck up a conversation.</p><p>“I suppose all the excitement of last night's news caused you to oversleep, Princess?”</p><p>Julieta doesn’t understand what she means and opens her mouth to ask when the man next to her brother decides to join the conversation and suddenly Julieta is hearing a roaring in her ears again.</p><p>“I hear the young Prince of Stornoway loves a ball, if you know what I mean.”</p><p>They exchange more comments between them, but Julieta doesn’t hear any of it because she suddenly realises the mistake she’s made. Instead of waiting for her to accept the situation, her father has already announced it to the court, leaving her no option but to accept it. <em>Oh</em>, she thinks she might throw up. Conversation goes on around her and she smiles, nods, agrees when someone asks her something. But her mind is far away from the breakfast table as people discuss her future around her and her father tries to catch her eye.</p><p>Somehow Julieta manages to avoid him all day.</p><p>When she normally has a music lesson she hides in the library, when she’s supposed to be replying to correspondences she takes a walk around the gardens, when she usually has tea with her aunt Victoria she hides away in the music room to leaf through old music sheets. An hour before dinner she feigns a headache and retreats back to her rooms, asking Lucinda to send her apologies to her father and brother, but she won’t be able to join them for their evening meal.</p><p>She thinks she’s gotten away with it, with avoiding him and the conversation and the argument, when she’s sitting down at her desk to reply to some letters and a knock comes at the door. A glance at the clock over her dresser in the corner tells her dinner is still on going so it’s probably a servant with her own food.</p><p>“Come in,” she calls, dropping her pen to the desk and raising from her chair and is three steps towards her little sitting area when her father walks into the room. There’s no crown on his head or heavy fabric coat on his shoulders which is how she knows he’s come to talk to her as her father not her king. But she doesn’t think it will make much of a difference.</p><p>“Lucinda said you were unwell, so I came to check how you are feeling?” He shuffles his feet on the rug and Julieta watches him for a moment longer before giving into the awkward tension quickly filling the room. She’s never liked the atmosphere of a room when two people are quarrelling.</p><p>“Better. Miss Greysen in the kitchens is going to send up some of her chicken soup,” she’s not sure what to do with her hands as she stands three steps away from her desk and ten away from the door where her father stands. She wishes she was still sitting down or still holding the pen or just hadn’t answered when the knock came because now they’re back to standing in awkward silence. She’s never stood in awkward silence with him before. She hates it but doesn’t know how to change it. She’s not the one at fault here.</p><p>“I’m sorry,” he starts and it takes Julieta by surprise. She opens her mouth to say something but is cut off by her father walking further into the room and sitting on the sofa she had been heading towards, he gestures for her to take the other half and Julieta only hesitates for a moment before doing so. “I shouldn’t have mentioned the engagement to the Wentworth's. It was… poor of me to do so when you were clearly so upset about it last night.”</p><p>All Julieta can do is nod at him, not sure what the correct response is because well, she’s still pretty upset about it tonight too.</p><p>“Julieta,” he says with a sigh, hands reaching across the distance to hold hers and she can’t help but notice how much bigger they are, wrinkles and little scars littering the skin. So much older. “I know you do not want to do this. And I broke my promise to you which is – it’s not right. A person is only as good as their word. What you said last night, about– about your mother–”</p><p>Julieta squeezes his hands on instinct, regret filling her for the way she had thrown those words in his face when she knew the effect they would have.</p><p>“I shouldn’t have said that, I’m sorry papa.”</p><p>“No, no, you were right. She would–” her father lets out a sigh, shaking his head and Julieta realises how <em>tired </em>he looks. It’s funny, how often she forgets that while she lost her mother, he lost his wife, his queen, his best friend. What must it be like, Julieta wonders, to suddenly find yourself carrying the burden of not just your family, but a whole kingdom of families on your shoulders alone? “She would not have approved of the way I handled things last night. She promised you would get to choose and I agreed. So I’ve spent the afternoon discussing it with my advisers and we have come to a… compromise. About when you are to be engaged.”</p><p>“Oh papa, thank you!” In retrospect, Julieta probably should have waited until he’d finished talking before thanking him or throwing her arms around his neck in a hug. But she was caught in the moment, in the idea that he had seen things her way.</p><p>“Of course. It shall be a long engagement, to allow you go get to know him a little first. I’m sure with time you will grow to love him.”</p><p>Julieta stills in his arms, the words spinning around in her head. ‘<em>A long engagement</em>’. ‘<em>Grow to love him</em>’. She was still to marry a stranger. Pulling back, she detangles herself from him so she can stand up, careful to ball her hands into fists at her side so he doesn’t see them shake.</p><p>“I don’t– You mean I’m still to marry him? I have no say in it?”</p><p>“Of course you are still to marry him. The arrangement has been made, I cannot go back on my word now.”</p><p>“You went back on your word to me!” She doesn’t mean to shout it, but it suddenly strikes her that there is no way out of this situation for her and she doesn’t know what to do.</p><p>“A broken promise to a seven year old is inconsequential in the grand scheme of things. You should know this Julieta! It is your duty to the kingdom. Happiness and love comes second. Stornoway is a small kingdom but they are rich in resources that we require, and they have but one son. You shall be his Queen. Is that not what you wanted? To be in charge?” He says it all calmly, in his King voice and it just makes Julieta angrier. The way he makes it all seem so <em>reasonable </em>and <em>right</em>. All the while completely ignoring her feelings on the matter.</p><p>“I don’t care about being a Queen! Why must my happiness come at the cost of a kingdom I will never have any say in? You have all made it very clear that a woman will never rule.” A flash of sorrow seems to pass over his face, but it’s gone so quickly, masked over by the face of a King that Julieta isn’t sure she really sees it. Her father stands up now and Julieta takes a step back, the space between them suddenly feeling like miles instead of the few feet it is.</p><p>“There will be no more discussion on this matter. As the princess of his kingdom you <em>shall </em>marry the prince of Stornoway, there shall be no more arguing. Arrangements will begin being made in the morning.”</p><p>Julieta raises her chin, nails cutting into the skin of her palms as she stares at him. “Please get out of my rooms. I’m suddenly feeling quite unwell. I don’t think I shall be able to join you for breakfast tomorrow.”</p><p>Her father seems to hesitate, one arm raising a fraction in the air as though he’s going to reach out to her, but then it drops and she watches him nod once and leave. She waits until she hears the clicking of the door shutting before falling to the floor where she stands, knees hitting the rug with a soft thud and one hand covering her mouth to try and muffle her cries. It’s anger, more than sadness with which she cries now. Anger at broken promises and lack of control and a crumbling relationship with her father. He has never ordered her before, never turned the stare of the king on her or not listened when she expressed distress. She has never in her life felt helpless like this.</p><p>Julieta doesn’t know how long she stays on the floor for, but eventually her knees start to ache and realises that staying on the ground isn’t going to help her. Though, as she pushes herself up, she’s not sure there’s anything that can help her out of her current situation. Short of running away there doesn’t really seem to be an out. She frowns to herself, pacing over to her desk and sitting back in her chair.</p><p>Running away. It’s a completely preposterous idea. Where would she even go? Leaning an elbow on her desk, Julieta rests her chin atop her fist and lets her eyes wander across the letters she still needs to respond to. None of the people in these letters were truly her friends, none of them she could run away to and expect help from. Perhaps if she could get to Marrae and lose herself in the city there, Princess Carrie was always saying how easy it was for one to start over in their kingdom. But how would she even go about it?</p><p>Leave through the secret passage in the music room and climb the wall of the rose garden and take the forest paths through the towns before disappearing into the abandoned roads of the Craghelm woods and then make the journey to Marrae on foot?</p><p>She would have to do all of that before Lucinda or the guards noticed she was missing. It took at least three hours to walk to the nearest town, possibly longer if she took the forest path, and she’d never taken it alone, let alone in the dark. But, Julieta frowned, shuffling pages on her desk, she would have until the morning. And she had told her father she wouldn’t be joining him for breakfast which means it might be entirely possible that no one would come to fetch her until the late morning at that.</p><p><em>Could</em> she run away? It would mean leaving Carlos, her home, her father, everything she has ever known. And there would be a scandal. She had never been involved in a scandal before. Had always done as she was told and followed the rules and made as little trouble as possible for her parents.</p><p>Julieta had always been told her role in the kingdom was not to rule or make decisions, as her father had made perfectly clear in the last two days, it was to do as she was told. Julieta was really tired of being told what to do. Biting her bottom lip, she moves her unanswered letters to the side and lays a blank sheet of paper out, her pen hovers over the top of the page and she watches as a drip of ink glides down the nib and splatters, stray drops hitting her skin. A plan is forming in her mind, based on books and bedtime tales and farfetched ideas. But it's a plan.</p><p>Blowing out a breath she writes her brother's names and explains why she is leaving.</p><p>She writes two more letters after signing her name on Carlos’. One for her aunt Victoria and one for her father. She thinks about leaving one for Lucinda too, but changes her mind, Julieta doubts there’s anything she could say that would allow the other woman to forgive her for ruining her chances of advancing in life.</p><p>With her letters finished, Julieta heads towards her bed chamber, picking up her satchel bag on the way and walks straight to her wardrobe. With the door open she purses her lips, surveying the dresses inside. They’re approaching the end of spring and she guesses it will take at <em>least </em>a month to reach the kingdom of Willomarrae on foot, but just because she’ll be traveling through summer doesn’t mean it wont get cold. But she also has to try and fit in, to not draw attention to herself. She thinks about the types of clothes she’s seen people in the villages wear, muted colours and sturdy materials and little decoration.</p><p>With a small frown she pushes several dresses aside until she comes across the dark blue gown she’d gotten last year when Victoria had suggested she spend more time in the gardens and Julieta had taken that to mean <em>help </em>in the gardens. She had planted a whole uneven row of dahlias before realising gardening wasn’t really for her. It has white lace along the cuffs of the three-quarter length sleeves and the buckle of the belt has a pattern inlaid with gold but she can fasten it up herself and is lightweight enough to move quickly in, so she thinks it’s probably her best option.</p><p>She changes quickly, lacing up her riding shoes and smiling happily when the skirts of her dress cover them. She pulls two extra chemises and stockings from her drawer, folds them carefully and puts them in her bag along with a selection of ribbons for her hair and, after a moment's thought, the mens trousers and shirt that Carlos had dared her to wear once. Julieta moves quickly through her rooms, picking up her mothers old journal and hers, rooting through her jewellery box for pieces that she assumes will be easy to sell should she need extra money. Then she drops diamond earrings and a sapphire brooch and three emerald encrusted rings into a pouch along with most of the money from her purse.</p><p>Holding it, she looks between the pouch and her bag, biting her lip before lifting her skirts and tying it to one of the loops at the bottom of her corset. It feels a little strange at first, the swinging weight against her hip, but after walking around her room for a while she barely notices it. She leaves the rest of her money in the little silk purse she got for her birthday and puts that in the pocket of her cloak. There’s a bowl of apples and a small box of chocolates that she adds in too, then Julieta takes one last look around her rooms, tries to think if there’s anything else she might need. But she’s never ran away before and is working sorely off of books she has read.</p><p>Money, food and clothes seemed like the essentials to her.</p><p>The clock in her room chimes ten o’clock and Julieta knows this is her last chance to change her mind because she has to leave now in order to avoid the patrol in the garden. She thinks back to how her father hasn’t listened to her, how he’s broken his promise in favour of strangers for a good price. Straightening her spine Julieta makes sure her letters to her family are in clear view on the desk – along with her responses to all the other letters, she might have been about to run away but it seemed rude to not answer –, secures her bag across her front and then drapes her favourite dark brown cloak over her shoulders, flipping the hood up to cover her hair and shield her face. She takes one last look around her rooms, trying to commit them to memory.</p><p>“Goodbye,” she whispers, brushes a stray tear of her cheek and slips out of the door</p><p>Moving through the palace hallways undetected is a lot easier then Julieta would have expected, and if she wasn't currently in the process of running away, she’d probably make a mental note to tell her father. Instead, she’s grateful that she doesn’t have to make any excuses to anyone. The music room is dark apart from strips of moonlight coming in through the windows, lighting up the keys on the piano and glinting off the strings of the harp. Julieta lets her fingers linger atop the keys for a moment, remembers the way her mother sat her on her knee and taught her to play. This is the room she’s going to miss the most, she knows, it’s the room where she was always happiest. There’s a book of songs sitting on top of the piano, classics and some that her mother had written and some that they’d written together. She slips it into her bag as well then turns her back on the piano and her memories and walks towards the bookcase in the corner, pulls the book of poetry that disguises the handle and vanishes into the dark hallway.</p><p>It’s only when she’s outside and walking through the rose garden, looking over her shoulder every few steps, that she realises she should have probably bought a timepiece with her. Some way to know how long she has before the garden patrol comes through. Instead she’s jumping at every little nose she hears as she approaches the back of the garden and the section of wall that’s just a little lower than the rest and with the two bricks that stand out just enough for her to use as steps.</p><p>With another look over her shoulder Julieta pauses by the wall to let out a shallow breath and count to five in her head, there’s still no sign of the guards but the second she starts climbing if they’re close by they’ll see her. She supposes it’s a risk she’s going to have to take. Blowing out another breath, she lifts her skirts and puts one foot on the lowest brick, feels it wobble then settles and, finding all her courage, Julieta begins to climb. Though it’s probably more like <em>pulling </em>herself up the wall because she quickly discovers that while her shoes are good for walking, they’re not very good at finding grip on brick walls.</p><p>Eventually, palms stinging and arms aching a little, Julieta pulls herself to the top of the wall and swings her legs over, trying to gauge how far the drop is and if she should try climbing down or just risk the fall. She’s biting her lip, eyes squinting against the darkness to try and find a place to climb down when she hears the sound of voices in the distance but coming towards her. She’s out of time. Awkwardly Julieta turns around, fingers gripping to the top of the wall as she slowly starts to lower the bottom half of her body down the wall and, closing her eyes, she lets go.</p><p>It’s a short drop and it’s only at the last second that she remembers to bend her knees a little, but she still lands hard, ankles buckling and tipping her onto the damp grass with a thud, air bursting out of her lungs in a huff. The guards voices grow louder and then quiet again as they move past the wall and out of the gardens and Julieta is left in the silence of the night.</p><p>On the wrong side of the wall.</p><p>She’s never been out in the forest alone before, and definitely never at night. Standing up with the wall for support Julieta peers into the darkness, grateful that while the path isn’t lined in brick it’s at least obvious enough for her to see and follow. Brushing down her skirts and straightening her cloak, she takes a moment to test her weight on her ankle, letting out a breath of relief when no pain flares up. Checks her bag is still secure and that her pouch of jewels is still concealed, Julieta quickly flips the hood of her cloak over her head again, tucking stray curls inside and looks back once, at the palace and the orange flicker of lights in some of the rooms.</p><p>This is truly her last moment to turn back, she knows that. If she starts walking down the forest path now there will be no turning back. It’s the only home she has ever known, but it’s also felt like a prison. Confining her to one state of being when she longs to be so much more. Julieta doesn’t know what she could be, <em>who </em>she could be, but she’s excited to find out. She lets her eyes take in the palace, sends a silent message of love and apologies into the air, and turns and walks away.</p><p>It becomes apparent quite quickly that Julieta doesn’t actually have any idea how long it takes to walk anywhere. She passed a little wooden sign post about an hour into her journey with an arrow pointing her in the direction she needed to go and a little ‘10miles’ next to it. That would have been at <em>least </em>four hours ago if her rough judgment of the moons position was anything to go by and she’d just passed yet another sign that said the town was still two miles away.</p><p>The sky has been growing progressively lighter the longer she walked and Julieta knew that dawn couldn’t be far off and she was tired and grumpy and <em>thirsty</em>. Because she had forgotten to bring water. Because she had never been out on her own before and she was so <em>stupid </em>to think she could survive. What possible survival skills did she have? She’d brought notebooks and hair ribbons but forgotten anything to drink.</p><p>She kicks at a stone on the path in frustration only to wince and let out a stream of curses that would make even some of their stable hands blush. She hops up and down on one foot, teeth biting into her bottom lip as she tries to counteract the pain in her toes.</p><p>“God damnit, why did I think I could– fuck! Stupid, so stupid–” Julieta’s too busy muttering to herself, carefully avoiding any other stones in her way, to notice another figure a short distance in front of her or the low sounds of a town coming awake in the distance. She does however notice when the figure in the distance calls out to her.</p><p>“Are you okay?”</p><p>It pulls her to a stop, eyes widening as she finally looks up and sees that she’s on the outskirts of the town. At the crossroads which connects it to all the surrounding towns and villages to be exact. Houses are starting to crop up with little farms and animals coming awake. Her eyes are drawn back to the person who spoke, the way they’re stood still, hood drawn up to cover their face, but Julieta still notices the skirts at the bottom of their cloak and the slight forced deepness of their voice. Another person out in the early morning trying to stay hidden.</p><p>“I–” Julieta blinks, trying to bring her thoughts back into order which she finds is a lot harder than it should be. But it’s been a long night so perhaps it’s to be expected. Wandering thoughts. “Yes, yes I’m fine. I just– I kicked a stone.” She shrugs and Julie thinks she must sound as hopeless as she feels because the stranger takes a step towards her, pushing her hood back a little to reveal part of her face. Dark skin and cautious eyes, but there’s a slight tugging up of her lips.</p><p>“I tripped over a tree branch a while back, I think I scared a squirrel with the way I shouted at it.”</p><p>It’s an embarrassing story for an embarrassing story and it takes Julieta a moment to recognise it for the gesture it is. It’s been a long time since she’d had a conversation with someone that wasn’t trying to win her favour. It’s a stranger being kind to another stranger on the road. So Julieta lets herself smile, a breathy laugh leaving her lips.</p><p>“I never knew nature was so against us,” she says, pulling her own hood back so that her face isn’t covered in the shadows anymore and almost immediately regrets it when something like recognition flashes across the other woman's face. Her fingers itch to pull her hood back up, to run away, to make some sort of order for silence. But this is her first real test of being outside of the palace and the royal family.</p><p>She’s not a princess now. She’s just Julieta. And oh god, she should have come up with a backstory before she left. Something like panic must cross her face because suddenly the other woman is frowning a little, but she’s not bowing or making any exclamations that might attract attention.</p><p>“My name is Lady Flynn of Rothington,” is the last thing that Julieta expects her to say. But a faint memory of meeting the Duke and Duchess of Rothington and their three daughters tugs at the back of her mind. It had been years ago, when her mother was still alive and there had been a ball for some event or another. Julieta remembers sneaking away with the eldest daughter to run through the hallways, because they were the same age and were bored and she was the Princess and no one could tell her no.</p><p>“I–” she starts, but all the words she wants to say seem to dry up in her throat and Flynn, either sensing it or just wanting to avoid the awkward silence that’s stretching between them speaks.</p><p>“I’m heading into town, there’s an inn that I’m told does a– a decent breakfast.”</p><p>It doesn’t escape Julieta's notices that Flynn doesn’t have an escort with her and, now that there’s not so much distance between them and the sky is turning from grey to orange, she can see a bag slung across her shoulders. Much like Julieta's is slung across hers.</p><p>“I suppose it would be… beneficial for us to walk together then. As we are heading in the same direction,” Julieta nods her head towards the town and slowly, neither of them really looking away from each other, they begin to walk. They’ve gone all of five steps, still glancing at one another every so often when Julieta breaks, and reaches out a hand to pull the other woman to a stop. She’s never liked awkward silences or judgmental looks.</p><p>“You know who I am?” She asks and blows out a breath when Flynn nods, eyebrows drawn together. “I would… ask you not to mention it to anyone. I’m–” she trails off because, what is she doing? Running away sounds too informal for the situation but ‘<em>I’m abandoning my home and my family and my duty to the kingdom</em>’ seems a little dramatic. Even if it’s true.</p><p>“I’m running away from home, to Marrae,” Flynn says and it’s the second time since they’ve met that her words have knocked Julieta off balance. “And, forgive me if I’m making assumptions here, but it would appear you are doing the same Princess.”</p><p>So perhaps ‘<em>I’m running away</em>’ wasn’t so informal after all. A startled laugh bubbles past her lips and Julieta is quick to cover her mouth with her hand to stop the sound, but it’s already out and instead of looking concerned Flynn smiles and laughs too. Julieta doesn’t really know what they’re laughing at, the absurdity of the situation? The chances of the two of them deciding to run away on the same night? That they’re both heading to the same place? Perhaps it’s just the fact that the sun is rising and neither of them have slept. Julieta lets out a breath, shaking her head just a little.</p><p>“I’m going to Marrae as well.” Julieta’s never been a very good liar, and if they’re both heading in the same direction the chances of them not bumping into each other on the road are slim. It would also be nice, Julieta reasons, to have company on her journey. She wonders if Flynn feels the same. “Shall we?”</p><p>Flynn inclines her head with a small smile and they start walking again, it’s still a little awkward but nowhere near as bad as before and by the time they reach the small high street there are other people out walking around and they look just like anyone else, up early with the sun to go about their days. If anyone was to look closely Julieta is sure they would see their dresses are made of finer materials and their postures are different from their own, but no one looks. The two of them come to a stop a short distance from the inn, heads tilted to the side as they look upon the sign, <em>Fig Leaf</em> seems like an odd name but there’s nowhere else for hot foot and a drink. And god, Julieta really needs a drink.</p><p>“Well, I suppose we should go in,” Flynn mutters, throwing her shoulders back like she’s about to face a great foe and not just a possibly grumpy innkeeper. Before the other woman can take more than a step Julieta reaches out to stop her with a hand on her forearm causing her to startle.</p><p>“Before we– go in. I would just like to ask that you don’t… mention my title and I won’t mention yours. Just–” she pauses, biting at her bottom lip as she tries to decide who she wants to be, who she wants to be known as. The name Julieta carries sway and power and life full of pre-made choices. Who she is now isn’t that. There was a name that her mother used to use when they were alone, whispered after nightmares and pressed into the palms of her hands when she fell down. She takes a breath in and lets it out, turning a soft smile to Flynn. “Please call me Julie.”</p><p>“Just two farm girls traveling to visit their mutual friend in Marrae. We are so very lucky to have parents who trust us to travel alone, aren’t we, Julie?” she says with a half smile and there’s a sparkle in her eyes that makes Julie smile brighter in turn.</p><p>She had thought for a moment after giving her new name that it would hurt, to hear someone else use the name only her mother had previously uttered. But it doesn’t. It feels –– it feels right.</p><p>With the hand still on her arm Julie wraps her fingers around it, tugging her new friend close so that she can link their arms, she sees Flynn’s eyes widen a fraction, but only for a moment before she’s relaxing again and placing her other hand on top of their linked arms. Walking into the <em>Fig Leaf </em>as a unit makes the whole thing seem easy.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>this is 100% gonna take me a while, but i've got it all planned out and i'm super excited for it so i really hope you'll follow me along on this hybrid fantasy historical journey ??<br/>as a sidenote, i tried really hard to get the boys introduced in this chapter but then julie took so long to run away that i never got the chance but they will arrive soon</p><p>anyway!!!<br/>i hope you're all staying safe in these hard times.<br/>hope you enjoyed! comments and kudos are appreciated!! mwah xox<br/>you can also find me on <a href="https://tangledstarlight.tumblr.com/"></a>tumblr where i post vague writing updates of me slowly loosing the plot!</p>
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<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p><b><i>trigger warnings!!</i></b> swearing, mentions of roses' death and mentions of violence.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
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      <em>once upon a time there was a girl who ran away from home, who made a new friend and learnt to start a fire and how to haggle with a farmer…</em>
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</blockquote><p>It’s never officially stated, but Julie and Flynn begin traveling together. At first, Julie reasons it’s simply because it makes logical sense. Two girls traveling the country alone raises eyebrows, but when they’re traveling together they can blend into a crowd easier. People overlook them when they pass through small villages. Just two more people relocating for hopes of a better life somewhere new.</p><p>They’re three days in and stopped by a stream to refill their canteens – because as it turns out, Flynn had forgotten to bring water with her too and they’d bought two leather skinned canteens from a stall on their way out of the first town and dutifully refilled them every two hours – and have a moment's rest, when Julie realises that their arrangement might be out of need, but she very much likes Flynn’s company.</p><p>“I wish I’d stolen a horse. Or at least a pair of one of the farm girls shoes! They make all this walking look easy!” She stretches her legs out in front of her, bare feet dipping into the water and Julie is moments away from joining her when Flynn lets out a hiss and retracts them, “Holy hell that’s freezing!”</p><p>Julie lets out a laugh, shaking her head a little at the other woman's antics and placing the refilled canteens on one of the rocks, leaning back on her hands as she lets her own legs stretch out in front of her.</p><p>“I know what you mean. I always thought walking was easy, if it wasn’t so far back and I wasn’t running away, I’d go back to the palace and ask how they do it,” that’s a new thing they’ve started doing, making joking comments about running away from home. It's strangely nice. “Though I suspect it’s out of obligation more than enjoyment.” She’d never <em>really </em>known before how easy her life was, how little work she had to do. But between all the walking and their disastrous first attempt at making a fire, Julie and Flynn were quick to discover just how sheltered their lives had been. It was sobering, if a little frustrating.</p><p>“I think I might write a letter to them at the next town, to thank them for all the times my father insisted they walk to town to fetch our new dresses,” Flynn sighs as she drys off her feet, slipping stockings and shoes back on. She looks out at the stream and the trees on the other side and Julie follows her line of sight.</p><p>It’s quite beautiful, she thinks, the leaves blowing in the light breeze, the sun glinting off the water, the sounds of birds chirping in the air. It makes her feel peaceful in a way Julie’s never felt peaceful. The further away from home that she gets the more she realises how trapped she felt within her life. It was more than just the arranged marriage, though that was the catalyst for her emotions. She had always been told what to do and what to wear and who to be. And it had only gotten worse after her mother died, the controlling ways of the court. Running away was the first choice she had ever made for herself, picking Flynn to be her travel companion and friend was the second thing. Two out of two wasn’t so bad, so she had pretty high hopes for all the rest she would make.</p><p>“Come on, we should keep going and try to reach the next village before nightfall,” Julie sighs, pushing herself up to her feet and brushing dirt and little pebbles off her skirts. Flynn blows out a dramatic sigh of her own but gets to her feet, passing Julie one of the water canteens while putting the other in her bag. They carefully pick their way back to the forest path and their journey onwards. They’re still at least five days away from the beginning of the Craghelm woods and the paths that will allow them to avoid any of the guards possibly on their trail. It was part of the reason why they were taking the forest paths between towns and not the main roads, Julie was fairly sure none of them would expect a princess to be <em>camping</em>.</p><p>“Tell me more about this school you’re going to attend?” Julie asks after they’ve set a casual pace and is rewarded with a bright smile from Flynn. She had told Julie the first day they met that the reason she had left home was because her parents refused to allow her to attend school. Flynn had no interest in being a wife or managing a household, she wanted to learn about the world and philosophy and how the new electric lights worked.</p><p>“Oh Julie! It’s meant to be magnificent! They have classes on all sorts of subjects and topics, with teachers from all over the world. And they were the first school on the continent to allow female admittances and they have these amazing scholarship opportunities for people too,” there’s a slight wistful tone in her voice and it makes Julie bite her lip in a smile.</p><p>“What are you most looking forward to studying? I think I'd be excited for the music. I hear there is a big music scene in Marrae,” her mother had once said they would visit when she was older. See an opera and the ballet and don disguises to visit some of the clubs in secret. She’s not sure she could face going alone.</p><p>“Philosophy and dance,” she looks at her from the corner of her eyes and Julie presses her lips into a line to stop herself from laughing at the strange choices. “One subject to grow my mind and one subject for… fun. It’s always best to have an even balance!”</p><p>Julie did laugh then, raising one hand between them as she saw Flynn glare a little at her, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry. It’s just– what a strange combination. Though I have no doubts you will make it work.” She’s only known Flynn a short while but her determination seems boundless.</p><p>“What about you? Do you have a plan yet for when we get there?”</p><p>She’s had many <em>plans</em> but none of them seem right or even feasible. For a while, after Flynn had told her her plan, Julie had thought about attending the school as well. But while the subjects interested her none of them pulled her attention or passion the way they did for Flynn. Then she’d thought about finding somewhere to play music, but it’s been a long time since she’s played for anyone but herself and she doubts there’s much of a call for a classic pianist in a city already full of musicians. Tucking a stray curl behind her ear she shrugs one shoulder and taps her fingers along her thigh as she walks.</p><p>“No, I’m hoping something will come to me by the time we get there. It’s a long journey after all. Plenty of time to think.” If all else fails she should at least have enough money to find herself somewhere suitable to stay for a while while she figures things out.</p><hr/><p>After the first four days of traveling, Julie has finally gotten the hang of starting a fire -- okay, so she’s not <em>entirely </em>sure the pathetic little pile of wood and small licking flames can be classed as a <strong>fire</strong>, but it gives them just enough light to see by and keeps the chill just far enough away -- in under an hour and Flynn has gotten over her aversion of slightly warm cheese and apples. It doesn’t mean either of them <em>like </em>the meal, but it’s better than nothing.</p><p>“I miss dauphinoise potatoes,” Julie mutters as she carefully cuts up her apple into slices, placing little squares of cheese along them in an attempt to make it feel fancier.</p><p>“I miss palmiers, we had a chef who would make this slightly sour jam to go with them. I could eat them by the platter,” there’s a longing note in Flynn’s voice that Julie understands all too well. Perhaps if one of them could find it in them to try hunting they wouldn’t spend every meal reminiscing about food, but Julie had almost twisted her ankle after falling in a rabbit hole and Flynn had screamed the second a fish brushed past her fingers.</p><p>So they weren’t hunters and they were too worried about accidentally poisoning themselves to attempt at being gathers, so they stocked up on apples and cheese and bread in each village they passed, and if there happened to be an inn they’d stop for a hot meal of some sort of meat stew and pretend it was boeuf bourguignon.</p><p>“Hopefully the town before Craghelm is big enough to have an inn that does something other than stew. And has beds not made of straw,” she looks off into the distance for a moment, thinking about her soft bed and warm sheets, “I’d even be happy for a bed with a blanket thicker than my chemises.”</p><p>“I just want somewhere that will draw me a hot bath.”</p><p>“Oh! I changed my mind, I want a hot bath too. I’d sleep in the stables if it meant I could bathe in the morning,” and properly wash her hair. In her haste to pack Julie had forgotten to bring along any of the tonics or creams that she used in her hair, but luckily Flynn had come prepared and she could use some of them. But cold water and sleeping outside didn’t really give them much chance to do more than dunk their heads and wrap. There was a lot of hoping and praying going on.</p><p>“Perhaps we should splurge a little at the last town, request their biggest room and enough water for two baths and their best food,” Flynn says, tilting her head slightly as she inspects the apple in her hand, rolling it between her fingers as she gets lost in thought.</p><p>Julie lets her be. There are moments, she’s found, when thoughts sneak up on a person unaware and capture your attention. Even if you’re in the middle of a conversation or an important task. Those moments seem to happen more frequently the longer that they travel. Julie didn’t know what thoughts ambushed Flynn, but for her it was memories and questions about her family. She would be sitting at an old wooden table in a run down inn, being served day old bread and watered down beer, and she would suddenly wonder what her father and brother were eating that night. Did they still eat in the family dining room now it was just the two of them? She would see a deer running through the trees as they walked during the day and Julie would think about how much Carlos would love to see it. How excited he would be by it all.</p><p>The moments always pass, but they leave behind a melancholy feeling that neither of them are sure how to quickly shake. So they spend an hour or two afterwards in a haze of silence. And maybe it’s the shared experience of running away or just being each other's only company for so many uninterrupted hours, but they understand each other a little now.</p><p>Julie knows that Flynn likes to try and distract herself with pointless silly court stories and Flynn knows that Julie likes to hum little lullabies that her mother used to sing. They don’t talk about the moment when it’s over.</p><p>Maybe they should, but Julie isn’t sure how that works in a friendship. She’s never had to worry about what she can and can’t ask, what’s appropriate or what’s not. She knows there’s a line, but she’s never had to look for it before, never had to watch what she says or where she steps. (It’s one of the things she’d always taken for granted as a Princess, that no one could ever really say <em>no</em> to her, not even the people who were her friends.)</p><p>But Flynn is her first <em>true</em> friend, different from Maria and a far leap from Lucinda, and Julie doesn’t want to do something wrong. So she doesn’t ask questions and neither does Flynn. It seems to be working for them so far.</p><p>As her friend stays locked in her thoughts, Julie eats her apple and watches the sky through the trees go from orange to grey and start to encase them in shadows and silence. It’s kind of peaceful, she decided a while ago, sitting by a crackling fire and watching stars appear in the sky. It makes her want to paint and write and sing. Her fingers itch for the journal tucked away in her bag and she’s just about to reach over to find it when she hears a branch snap somewhere behind her and turns her head to peer into the growing darkness.</p><p>She squints her eyes but all she can see is trees and shadows. They’d been lucky so far, only bumping into one other group of people during their time in the forest who had wanted trouble about as much as they had. But not even Julie was naive enough to think they would be able to avoid trouble forever –– a fact she is constantly reminded of when they reach a village and overhear people talking about the gangs roaming the woods, they all had awfully funny names for groups of roughians.</p><p>She was just really hoping whatever trouble happened would occur during daylight hours. Preferably when they were close to a village. Okay, so maybe she was still a <em>little </em>naive.</p><p>Her eyes roam over the semi-darkness for a moment longer, shoulders tense and fingers tight around her small knife, but she doesn’t see anything so starts to turn back to the fire when she could swear she hears someone <em>shushing</em> someone.</p><p>“Did you–” she starts eyes going to Flynn only to find the other girl already looking at her with wide eyes that quickly dart over Julie’s left shoulder. Into the darkness where she’d just been gazing. A small voice in the back of her head says not to turn back around, if she doesn’t look she can go on pretending everything is fine. But Flynn’s eyes dart back hers and this time she <em>knows </em>she can hear whispering from the shadows. Oh god, they’re going to die, aren’t they?</p><p>Everything seems to happen at the same time then. Julie drops her slices of apple and Flynn picks up the fire poker she had bought from home –– because Flynn is a genius and had even remembered to bring something to defend herself with, honestly Julie was getting more and more embarrassed about her own packing –– just as two figures jump out of the shadows behind her, two more appearing behind Julie herself. She’s pretty sure they were trying for surprise, but one of them lets out a loud shout and Julie jumps up startled more at the sound then <em>them</em>, knife dropping from her fingers.</p><p>She lets out a curse, tries to pick up her skirts to locate the knife on the ground while still trying to keep an eye on the two approaching figures, she can feel her heartbeat picking up the closer they get and –– <em>there</em>! She spots the handle of the knife just a few inches away from her foot, all she has to do is duck down quickly and pick it up. The chances of them being able to fight the attackers off is very slim, but Julie isn’t about to <em>not </em>try.</p><p>The two figures seem to be moving quicker and she can see the outline of something that looks like a sword in one of their hands, Julie swallows back the urge to scream or cry or run. None of that will help her here. Flynn lets out a loud yelp behind her and Julie spins in time to see one of the strangers wrapping their arms around her upper body, pinning Flynn’s flailing arms to her sides as the other pries the poker from her hands and Julie thinks the person must say something because her friends eyes widen a fraction and Julie thinks she must be about to respond but doesn’t get to see how.</p><p>Because a pair of arms circle around her middle, pulling her against a warm hard body and lifting her feet off the ground just a little. A gasp of air leaves her lungs at the sudden contact and she starts kicking her feet, fingers gripping and scratching at the arms around her to try and get them off, her captor seems to stumble back a step at the attack and Julie uses it as a chance to try and wrench herself free of their hold.</p><p>“Would you just– please just–” Julie wasn’t sure what she expected them to sound like, but it wasn’t someone clearly trying to deepen their tone only for it to come out almost in a whine as they tighten one arm around her middle, their other arm letting go only to try and catch her still scratching hands. The man lets out a curse followed by a pleased ‘ha!’ when he finally extracts one of her hands from scratching at <em>his</em> hand, and maybe it’s adrenaline or fear or just plain annoyance at being grabbed. But Julie ducks her head to where he’s claimed one of her hands and bites the back of his.</p><p>“Ow!” All pretence of trying to change their voice is gone and Julie notes they sound a little boyish in his exclamation. The arm around her middle drops and the hand trying to hold on to hers is gone too, feet suddenly back on the ground, Julie is quick to spin around and put some distance between the two of them. As she turns, a fairly large branch near the fire catches her eye and she dives for it. The man follows her and, just as her fingers wrap around the rough bark, his fingers wrap around her upper arm. Acting on instinct, Julie swings the branch at him.</p><p>It reverberates up the wood as it catches up on his shoulder and just below his jaw, knocking his hand away from her arm and sending up falling to the ground in a thud of shock and curses. Julie isn’t sure what to do now she sort of has the upper hand, tightening her grip on the branch, she tries to look intimidating as she stands over him but her hands shake and she’s panting from all the sudden movement, hair coming loose from the ribbon she had tied it back with earlier, and she’s fairly sure she’s got a wild, panicked look in her eyes.</p><p>“You bit me!” he shouts, fingers touching his jaw with a wince before quickly pulling away.</p><p>“<em>You</em> attacked me!” Julie counters, furrowing her brow as she glares at him, her branch dipping a little as she wants to put her hands on her hips.</p><p>With the light of the fire Julie can finally see his face and has to fight to keep the surprise off of her own. Because he’s a lot younger than she had been expecting, and much more handsome. With brown hair falling into his wide eyes staring at her in shock –- though it almost looks a little like <em>awe</em>, but it’s dark and all sort of new emotions are running through her system so she can’t really be sure about what she’s seeing –- as one hand holds his shoulder. Julie opens her mouth to say something else at the same time that he opens his own and they end up staring at each other for a prolonged moment that’s only broken by the sound of someone <em>laughing</em>.</p><p>Julie whips her head around having almost forgotten that they weren’t alone in the little clearing. The person who had been holding Flynn has let her go and is pacing, a hand running through his hair, a short distance away from where her friend is standing, arms crossed and frowning at them. But neither of them had done the laughing, instead it’s the second person she had seen coming towards her and who she had lost sight of in her scuffle, who’s now stood across the fire from her with their bag of apples held in one hand.</p><p>He lets out another laugh, head thrown back before he sucks in a breath, shaking hair out of his eyes when he looks back at her with a wide smile. No, not at her, at the person she had knocked on the floor. Laughing at his friend. Julie chances a look back at him too and almost lets out a startled laugh of her own when she finds him sitting up, rubbing a hand over his shoulder and pouting at them with a furrow between his brows that only seems to highlight his lower lip sticking out.</p><p>“S’not funny,” he grumbles, eyes darting between her, his friend and the branch she still has held in the air.</p><p>“She knocked you right over!” The darker haired man lets out another laugh and Julie starts to feel less frightened and more annoyed with the situation.</p><p>“And she’ll knock <em>you</em> right over to if you don’t go away,” she tries to make it sound like an order while not trying to sound too much like a princess. It’s a much harder balance to find then she’d ever thought about.</p><p>The man on the other side of the fire holds up his free hand, palm out and has the decency to look guilty about something –- Julie isn’t sure if it’s for laughing or attacking them or apparently stealing their apples. He seems about to say something when the fourth figure steps forward, both hands out in what she assumes is supposed to be a calming gesture, but Julie’s eyes glance wearily to the sword holder at his hip and Flynn’s fire poker in his hand, she can’t <em>see </em>a blade anywhere but judging by his broad shoulders and tied back hair, Julie would hazard a guess that he’d know how to use one.</p><p>“Look we’re sorry. We just needed–” he gestures in the direction of the other man still holding their bag of apples, “We didn’t mean to scare you. And here look, let me just-” he jumps over the log that they’d been sitting on only moments earlier and steps up to the fire, prodding it with Flynn’s poker and rooting through the collection of sticks and branches they’d collected before carefully placing two medium sized ones into the flames. “Throw on one more log before you go to sleep and it should last the night. Right, we’ll be going now. Reg,” he nods at the man by the fire and he shoots her a wave that just makes Julie blink in growing confusion.</p><p>Distracted by the man – <em>Reg</em> – and his fire fixing friend backing away, Julie doesn’t notice the man on the ground in front of her standing up until he’s already taken three steps backwards.</p><p>“Sorry!” He calls and then he’s turning around and running back into the growing shadows of trees along with his companions, leaving Julie and Flynn in a sudden confusing silence.</p><p>“I don’t–” she starts, mouth opening and closing as she looks from where they had vanished and back to Flynn who’s looking just as confused as Julie feels. “Did they just steal our apples, fix the fire and then <strong>go</strong>?”</p><p>“It would seem so,” Flynn nods, eyes still a little wide and dazed.</p><p>“Did they hurt you?” Julie asks, finally dropping the branch with a relieved sigh and walking towards where Flynn has collapsed back on her side of the log they’d been sitting at. Fingers starting to shake and knees suddenly feeling weak, Julie joins her.</p><p>She shakes her head, hair flying in front of her eyes that she brushes away impatiently, tucking it behind her ears as she leans forwards, “I’m fine. I should be asking if <em>you’re </em>okay.”</p><p>Julie clasps her hands together, fingers interlocking and pushes them between her legs and deep into her skirts to try and get them to stop shaking even as she lifts her shoulders in an awkward shrug. She’s unhurt, aside from a broken nail and scratches on her palms from the branch, but all that she had done to herself. Really, she’d done more to hurt <em>them </em>–– the image of the boy with kind eyes falling to the ground replays in her head and she bites back a smile.</p><p>“I’m– I’m okay. I don’t...I do not think they were trying to hurt us,” she says it carefully as she looks at her friend, relieved when Flynn nods in agreement.</p><p>“They weren’t. The one who grabbed me said they just wanted our apples,” Flynn rolls her eyes with a scoff and Julie can’t blame her. Who just steals <em>apples</em>?</p><p>Blowing out a breath she lets her eyes wander to the fire as the last of her adrenaline wears off and she shivers. The shadows around them suddenly feel bigger and deeper. Pulling her hands free of her skirts Julie reaches down for her cloak, draped over her bag and throws it around her shoulders.</p><p>“I think we should start sleeping in shifts. And try to avoid sleeping in the forest for the rest of this part of the journey. I’ll take the first watch,” she mutters, partly because she doesn’t think she’d be able to sleep now anyway and partly because it seems like the right thing to do. It’s what they did adventure stories, wasn’t it? Companions sleeping in shifts and keeping an eye on the shadows.</p><p>“I don’t think I’ll be getting much sleep tonight,” but even as Flynn says it she yawns.</p><p>“Try anyway?” Julie slips off the log, pulls her cloak a little tighter around her shoulders and drapes her skirts over her legs so they’ll stay warm then looks up at Flynn, one bro raised. It only takes a moment before Flynn is sighing and picking up her own cloak to join Julie on the ground.</p><p>So far they’ve been sleeping next to each other, but always with a little space between them. Julie’s pretty sure it’s a hangover from all the many etiquette lessons they’d been forced to sit through over the years, it’s always been that someone couldn't just touch her first. She was a princess. But that line that they have been blurring more and more during daylight, is finally fully crossed over tonight. Flynn bumps her shoulder against hers, small smile on her lips as she makes herself comfortable.</p><p>“I think they were the worst roughians I’ve ever met,” Flynn mutters, head on Julie’s shoulder as they both stare into the fire. She’s not <em>too </em>proud to admit it’s already looking better.</p><p>“Have you met many other roughians?” Julie teases lightly, though she secretly agrees. In her mind, the gangs who roam the forest are all old and scared and rude, with mean eyes and hands that don’t send shivers up her spine. Four young men around their age with infectious laughs and soft eyes and saying <em>sorry</em>, doesn’t really match up with her mental image.</p><p>“About the same amount as you, I suspect,” they lapse into silence and Julie thinks Flynn has perhaps fallen asleep when she speaks again. “I wish I could tell someone about you knocking the boy out with a branch. It would be the talk of the whole kingdom.”</p><p>Julie giggles, bites at her bottom lip as she tries not to be too loud, “No one would ever believe you. As far as the courts concerned all I know how to do is smile and play a few pretty songs.”</p><p>“The more you talk about your fathers the court the more glad I am that my parents rarely made me attend,” she says with a soft scoff that softens into a smile as Flynn turns her head slightly to look up at her, “Though perhaps if they had we would have been friends long before now. We could have coordinated what to pack for running away much better.”</p><p>Perhaps neither of them would have felt the need to run away at all if they’d had each other before now, Julie privately thinks. Life feels so much easier to tackle with a friend by your side. Instead of saying that though she reaches down and clasps Flynn’s hand in hers and leans her head on top of hers. “I suppose we shall never know, though I am <em>awfully </em>glad we are friends now, Flynn.”</p><p>“As am I, Julie.”</p><p>There’s still such a thrill at not being addressed by her title that it makes her smile, squeeze her friends hand and try to push all thoughts of what-ifs and maybes and terrible gangs to the back of her mind.</p><hr/><p>They start trying to sleep in shifts after their eventful night. The key word being ‘<em>try</em>’ because neither of them are very good at actually staying awake or remembering to wake the other up. Julie knows it would be easier if they could spend the nights in inns that each village has, but they’re not very good at making it to said villages before nightfall. Walking takes so much <em>longer </em>than either of them ever anticipated.</p><p>So they keep spending the night in the forest, in little clearings that they find that have clearly been the resting spot of previous travellers. And trying to sleep in shifts.</p><p>(When they’d made it to the village the morning after their ‘attack’ the two of them overheard a conversation as they waited for their food to arrive. Apparently there was a new gang of outlaws wandering the forest and ambushing unaware travellers just after the sunset on an evening. They hadn’t ventured close to any of the villages yet but it was only a matter of time, according to the man spreading the news, before the ‘<em>sunset bandits attack our own homes!</em>’. Neither Julie or Flynn had commented on it, but they had shared a look, because if the so-called <em>sunset bandits </em>were the same people who had ambushed <em>them</em> then they doubted anyone had anything to worry about. Unless they were willing to put a guard on their apple supply.)</p><p>Julie’s pretty sure she’s accidentally fallen asleep at some point again because when she startles awake later the sky is brightening and their fire is glowing embers on the ground and–– she blinks a few times at the fire poker she had dropped last night just a short distance from her feet and the lumpy parcel next to it. That definitely hadn’t been there when she had closed her eyes.</p><p>Carefully extracting herself from under Flynn she awkwardly shuffles herself over to the poker, noticing the scrap of paper attached and pulls it free. A furrow appears between her brows as she struggles to decipher the writing only for them to shoot up when she finally does.</p><p></p><blockquote>
  <p>
    <em>Sorry about taking your apples. Hope this is repayment enough. </em>
  </p>
</blockquote><p>And there’s a name underneath but it’s been crossed out and scribbled over, as if the person had signed it only to realise they shouldn’t give away their name at the last second. Placing the note on the ground Julie carefully pulls the knotted fabric free to reveal a collection of dried meats and–– Julie bursts out laughing at the two bruised apples.</p><p>“Wha- what’s happenin’?” Flynn’s sleep filled voice causes Julie to let out another laugh, a little quieter this time as she looks over her shoulder.</p><p>“The Sunset Bandits left us a gift,” she says, holding up one of the apples with a shake of her head.</p><p>“They gave us back our apples?” That seems to wake Flynn up, and Julie watches as she tries to fight a smile but gives in and they’re both laughing at the absurdity of the situation.</p><p>“They really are the worst outlaws I’ve ever heard of,” Julie says later after they've packed up their little camp and are once again walking. They’d each eaten an apple and a slice of the dried meat for breakfast, pleasantly surprised by how nice it was. Julie idly wondered who they’d stolen <em>that </em>from.</p><p>“Mm, they feel much more like <em>annoyances</em>,” Flynn agrees, biting off a piece of the meat and chewing thoroughly. Licking grease off her fingertips, she points at Julie and starts walking backwards, “Okay, we have at least one more night before we’re at Craghelm town and I feel like we should make a plan for what we do once we get there. We’re obviously going to need to stock up on things before we head into the woods.”</p><p>“Oh!” Julie exclaims, hands reaching for her bag and pulling out her journal to flip through to one of the back pages where a pencil was saving her place, “I started making a list last night! I think we should try and see if we can buy a horse first of all, because that way we could travel quicker.” The chances of locating a horse for sale were probably quite slim, but it still seemed like a good idea.</p><p>“That’s a good idea. Have you put those um...bed roll things?” Julie nodded her head, one finger tapping on the page as she tried to still watch where she was going. “We should probably try and see if we can get some of this dried meat. It must last longer than fresh food, right?”</p><p>Julie didn’t know, but it seemed logical to her and carefully added it to her list with the pencil stuck between the pages. “The list is mostly food if I’m honest. I’m still not entirely sure what else we need.” Despite the fact they had been on the road together for almost a week now.</p><p>“Perhaps we ought to ask someone?”</p><p>“We could try.”</p><hr/><p>Despite the fact that getting to Craghelm town had been Julie’s second point of action for her running away plans, it was actually the place she was most concerned about being. It was the second largest town in their Kingdom and one of three central points for travel. Nearly everyone who came in or out Embriapassed through. Which meant if there were to be any palace guards looking for her in her Kingdom, it was the first place they would go, it’s also the place where if someone was to recognise her (or Flynn for that matter) it would be there.</p><p>Julie was fairly confident that they had taken such a long time traveling via the forest paths that any guards who had been in the town would be gone. But there was always a possibility that they’d leave someone behind to keep any eye out, or that she’d miscalculated and they’d all arrive at the same time. Good lord that would be an awkward encounter. Even more so when she would try to politely refuse to go with them.</p><p>They’d taken extra care that morning to braid back their hair in the style of all the other girls their age, tying off the ends with two of Julie’s ribbons and picking through their collection of coins and jewels as they tried to guess how much they would need for everything. (Three gold coins and a handful of copper ones were stashed in the little purse tucked into her dress pocket alone with one of the rings, neither of them are quite sure <em>how </em>to sell their jewels yet but they’re sure it can’t be too hard.) For the first time, Julie’s glad for the mud staining the bottom of her dress and the streaks of grass on her cloak, they look just like anyone else wandering into town.</p><p>Maybe it’s luck or fate, but they arrive in the town on market day, crowds of people milling around and trying to sell their wares -– Julie is leaning towards <em>fate </em>because it’s always fate that plays a key role in all the books she’s ever read. Fate has led them to town on market day and it’s bound to pay off. Perhaps they’ll get that horse after all.</p><p>Arms linked, Flynn weaves them through people and straight to a stall selling bolts of fabric and scraps of lace and, rolled up leaning against the front and tied with leather straps, bedrolls.</p><p>“What can I help you two dears with, then?” She has a kind smile but it doesn’t seem to reach her eyes and, not for the first time, Julie sees the differences between all the people she had grown up surrounded by and the real people in her kingdom. Putting her best smile on Julie points at two of the rolls closest to them.</p><p>“We’ll take two of the bedrolls please.”</p><p>Apparently that hadn’t been what the woman was expecting her to say because she blinks at them, eyebrows drawn together and then she blinks again and her smile is back in place. “Can I interest yous in some blankets to go with ‘em?”</p><p>They walk away from the stall with a bedroll and two blankets each, and Julie had been persuaded to buy one of the navy ribbons, because it matched her dress. Stood a little out of the way of the main crowds, Julie crouches down to try and push the blankets through the leather straps of her bedroll without having to undo the whole thing; she doesn’t feel so hopeless when she sees Flynn struggling just the same.</p><p>“I think, perhaps, we are easy targets,” Julie mutters as she impatiently brushes a loose curl behind her ear as she finally gets the blankets through and blows out a breath. She really didn’t <em>need </em>more hair ribbons.</p><p>“It’s you,” Flynn huffs, finally giving up and just undoing one half of her bedroll and starts wrapping the blankets through. Julie doesn’t mean to, but she lets out an indigent squeak.</p><p>“Me? What do you mean it’s <em>me</em>!?”</p><p>“It’s–” she pauses, looks up at her with a small tilt of her head, “It’s your everything. You’re always so nice to everyone, and you can’t say no when they offer you something.”</p><p>Julie frowns at that, because she’d never thought about it before. Saying no when she was offered something she didn’t want. It had just always seemed so… <strong>rude</strong>. Someone had worked hard on the meal or the clothing or the art or bouquet of flowers. Furrowing her brows she looks at Flynn, “Well I don’t see <em>you </em>saying no either.”</p><p>“You were not the only one raised with manners and very little choice in their life,” she teases and oh. Of course. Julie feels her brows soften and offers her friend a small smile before reaching over to help with the blanket and decides that the next time someone offers her something she doesn't want, she's going to say no.</p><p>At the next stall –– where they buy a selection of different dried foods and more cheese and Flynn haggles with the man about the price of a pan –– Julie says no when asked if she’d like any of the radishes, and turns a wide proud grin to Flynn as they walk away.</p><p>“Oh that was quite thrilling! I’ve always hated radishes, they don’t make any sense. Or taste of anything,” she wrinkles her nose, readjusting the strap of the new bag that Flynn had acquired in her pan deal. She’s feeling so confident that when she overhears a farmer talking about how someone is selling a horse and cart on the other side of the road by the stables she pulls Flynn away from the stall selling tonics and potions with a quick goodbye to the owner.</p><p>There’s a small group of people outside the stables but none of them seem to be talking to the farmer standing next to a worn looking cart and chestnut brown horse. Julie shoots a wide smile at Flynn and starts walking over to him, trying to contain the bounce in her step. Oh, she just <em>knew </em>it was fate that had gotten them here on this day. No guards, two bedrolls and now a horse. And a cart as well!</p><p>“Hello!” She greets him, apparently too cheerfully if the weary look he gives her is any indication and Julie tampers down her smile, clasps her hands together and nods at him politely, “We’re here to inquire about buying your horse and cart.”</p><p>“Oh ‘fraid your too late miss.”</p><p>Julie blinks at him, a smile frozen on her face as she tries to hear past his thick accent because she’s fairly sure he just said they were too late. And that doesn’t make sense, because <em>fate </em>had gotten them here today in time to buy a horse.</p><p>“We’re willing to pay double what the other person has offered,” the words leave her lips before she can stop them and she sees his eyes widen just as she sees Flynn's do the same from the corner of her eye.</p><p>“You don’ even know what they’ve offered,” he says but there’s a slight glint in his eyes that she’s fairly sure means she has his attention. Haggling, she’s pretty sure, isn't going to be one of her skills in life.</p><p>“It doesn’t matter, we’ll still pay double. How much?” She’s already reaching for her skirt pocket, fingers wrapping around the strings of her purse when a new voice joins the conversation and Julie finds herself stilling at the vague familiarity of it.</p><p>“We’ll double whatever she doubles!”</p><p>Slowly, she looks up to find a young man standing a short distance to her left, mud encrusted on his boots and streaks along one leg, the shirt he’s wearing has seen better days judging by the tear on the right shoulder and how he’s hastily tucked it into his trousers. Julie feels her eyes widen a fraction when they reach his face. She had thought he was handsome in the dim glow of firelight, but in daylight she thinks he is possibly more so, especially with his hair slightly curling in front of his eyes. His eyes that are staring at her in recognition too.</p><p>Julie opens her mouth to say something –– she’s not sure if it’s going to be an exclamation of anger or a thank you for the returned apples –– but doesn’t get the chance before Flynn lets out a startled, “You!” and is glaring at three others who have appeared behind them.</p><p>“Oh fuck,” she hears one of them mutter, and watches perplexed as he runs his hands through uneven blonde hair, pulling a little at the roots as he closes his eyes in a sigh. The one with his hair tied back in a bun and a sword belt at his hip –– though she still sees no sign of the actual blade –– puts a hand on his shoulder, says something quietly that only the blonde catches. Once again Julie finds herself opening her mouth to say something when the horse decides to interrupt by stomping one foot on the ground and she turns back to face the first man, pretty eyes or not, Julie is getting that horse.</p><p>“You can’t do that, we were here first,” she glares at him. At least she’s decided on a tone, it would be awfully hard to slip a thank you in now.</p><p>“Maybe so but you haven’t made a deal yet, which means the horse is still up for sale,” he counters, taking a step closer to her, a smile in his eyes. She hadn’t really realised it that night they had stolen from them, but he was a head taller than her and now she has to lean her head back slightly to keep eye contact.</p><p>“But on principle you should back off because we were in the middle of making one,” Julie isn’t actually sure if that’s true, she’s never made a deal about a horse before.</p><p>“That doesn’t even make sense!” he scoffs, frowning down at her with an annoying smirk on his face that she really wishes she could wipe off with another branch.</p><p>“Fine! You should go away given the last time we met you stole from us!”</p><p>“The last time we met you bit me!”</p><p>“You attacked us first!” He really was awfully caught up in the biting thing, she wondered if he even remembered that she’d hit him with a branch too.</p><p>“And we apologised. And returned your apples. Plus interest!” he points a finger at her, but he can only raise his hand a short way before it gets caught between them, and it’s then that they both realise just how close they’ve gotten, and how loud.</p><p>Julie feels a blush rising in her cheeks and takes two step backs, brushing her hands down her skirts and looking everywhere but at him. Which is how she notices that the man with the horse and cart is gone, and their audience of friends are discussing something without them.</p><p>“What––” she starts but the dark haired boy that Julie vaguely remembers being called–– Ted? Greg? Oh! Reg, it was Reg –– Reg waves her question off before she even utters it.</p><p>“You two scared him off with your little… discussion,” he takes a step towards them with a grin, apparently amused by it all. “Flynn says you’re heading to Marrae too.”</p><p>It’s not really a question, but Julie nods her head anyway, eyes darting to Flynn who’s crossed her arms and smiles at something that the blonde one says. Julie frowns, suddenly feeling very lost and hopes it shows in her eyes as her friend looks at her.</p><p>“We’re all going in the same direction and it would make sense if we traveled together,” Flynn starts and as if she can see the argument already on the tip of her tongue is quick to continue, “There’s no other horses or carts for sale, they’ve already checked, and chances are we’d just end up following each other anyway, <em>and</em> they <em>did </em>apologise for that night in the forest,” Flynns eyes are wide as they look at her and Julie gets the feeling there’s another reason too but can’t work out what. “Plus, they have a map to the Craghelm woods, and we don’t.”</p><p>Oh. Well that was a good point. Pursing her lips Julie looks between the four boys, granted they don’t exactly <em>look </em>dangerous. And during the one other encounter with them she herself had caused the most damage. Stepping closer to Flynn, she grabs her friends hands and asks quietly, “Are you sure? You trust them?”</p><p>“I wouldn’t say <em>trust</em>. But I don’t think they’re bad people. Who only steals apples?” she squeezes her hands with a reassuring smile. It would just be a partnership of convenience, she thinks, at most all they would have to do is share a fire. It would be nice to not have to attempt to make a fire again. Looking up again she lets her gaze linger on each of them for a moment. Hesitant smiles and tapping fingers and kind eyes. They really don’t see like the outlaws she’s read about. Blowing out a breath she nods at Flynn.</p><p>“Okay. We shall travel together then,” she tries to smile at them, but it feels a little more like a grimace.</p><p>“Great! We really <em>are </em>sorry about the other night. This is Alex, and Willie,” the dark haired one claps a hand on the blondes shoulder as he says <em>Alex </em>and pulls the long haired man close to his side with one hand wrapped around his bicep as he says <em>Willie</em>, “And I’m Reggie,” he dips his head once with a grin, and Julie mentally corrects <em>Reg </em>with <em>Reggie</em>. “And that––” but Reggie gets cut off by said fourth person stepping into their little circle, eyes on her.</p><p>“I’m Luke,” he says, eyes wide and earnest as he holds out a hand to her. Like a do over, she thinks. She looks at his hand for a moment, pulling her bottom lip between her teeth as her eyes search his face. Julie doesn’t really know what she’s looking for, but all she finds is curiosity.</p><p>“Julie,” she accepts his hand, resisting the urge to shiver as his fingers close over hers, calloused fingertips lightly brushing over her skin and then he does something that causes her breath to hitch and the world to turn hazy.</p><p>Carefully, he rotates their joined hand and lifts them up to his mouth where he presses a featherlight kiss to her knuckles.</p><p>And then he’s letting go and Julie is taking a step back and the world comes back into focus around her.</p><p>Flynn links their arms, and she’s sure there are plans being made but she can’t help but glance over at Luke as they walk and her heart speeds up just a beat when she finds his eyes already on hers.</p><p>Perhaps fate had a different plan for her today after all. </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>i wanna say that i dont think all the chapters will be this long, but i also dont actually know fdghj but now all the gang it together!! and im excited for what i've got planned next!! and for julie and luke to be stubborn as they slowly drive the others mad. </p><p>thank you for all the lovely kind comments on the first chapter, i'm so glad people are excited for this too. </p><p>anyway!!!<br/>i hope you're all staying safe in these hard times.<br/>hope you enjoyed! comments and kudos are appreciated!! mwah xox<br/>you can also find me on <a href="https://tangledstarlight.tumblr.com/"></a>tumblr where i post vague writing updates of me slowly loosing the plot!</p>
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<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>i know i said no horse but i just want reggie to get to be his true horsegirl self okay. also i dont know where the cat came from either.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p></p><blockquote>
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    <strike>
      <em>once upon a time there was a girl who helped name a cat and learnt to cook a fish and bared her soul to a stranger in the night…</em>
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</blockquote><hr/><p>Fate, Julie decides, is actually playing some sort of game that she doesn’t understand.</p><p>The next morning –– after herself and Flynn spent the night in the nicest inn in town, soft sheets and hot water included –– they make their way to the outskirts of the town where they’d agreed to meet their new… traveling companions. A small part of her is almost convinced they won't be there. That they will have changed their minds over night and left without them. Or that they <em>will </em>be there but only to ambush them again for apples and coins. She’s not sure which option she likes better.</p><p>What Julie hadn’t been expecting was to find a greying horse and Reggie securing saddle bags to it while Alex passes him them and Willie feeds it an apple. There’s no sign of Luke and Julie decides not to look too closely at the sting of disappointment.</p><p>Reggie spots them first, one hand dropping away from the horse to wave them over with a wide smile. Cautiously they approach, stopping a short distance away from the boys and the horse. There had been no mention of a horse last night while they made their plans. And then there was the fact they had said --</p><p>“I thought you said there weren’t any other horses for sale?” Flynn accuses, though Julie can’t really detect any hostility in her tone, more like curiosity.</p><p>“Oh, we didn’t buy this hor–” Reggie starts, only to be cut off by Alex roughly shoving a bag into his chest, eyes wide and eyebrows raised, clearly having some sort of silent conversation they were not to be part of. But Julie’s attention has been caught on his words and she frowns in concern, looking from the horse to the boys quickly.</p><p>“Please tell me you didn’t <em>steal </em>this horse from some poor farmer? I understand you’re… <em>bandits </em>or whatever but I don’t want any part in <em>thievery</em>.”</p><p>“What?” Alex is frowning at them now honestly looking confused at her question, “We’re not-- okay that-- Doesn’t matter. No, we didn’t steal the horse! We just– Look, it doesn’t matter <em>how </em>we got the horse, okay? But we got us a horse.”</p><p>That doesn’t sound very convincing to her, but Julie doesn’t want to start their new partnership off on an argument so she takes a few steps forward until she’s stood next to Willie, head tilted as she looks at the mare. Slowly, she raises a hand up to gently brush her fingers along the horse's nose who huffs, bumping against her hand as if in search of food. Julie smiles a little, letting her fingers stroke across the fine hair as she shakes her head.</p><p>“Sorry, I’ve not got any apples for you.”</p><p>“Her name is Bridget,” Julie doesn’t mean to jump at the sound of Luke’s voice coming from her left, but she hadn’t seen him approach and his sudden close proximity is enough for her to let out a startled ‘oh’ as she looks over at him. One half of his mouth is pulling up in a smile as he looks at her, like he knows he’s surprised her and glad of it.</p><p>Julie pulls her eyes away from him and back to the horse –– Bridget –– who’s not given up looking for more food and is nuzzling her nose into her empty palm. Now that she knows he is standing next to her she doesn’t startle when Luke’s hand appears next to hers with an apple that Bridget gladly takes.</p><p>“She’s too old to work in the fields anymore and can’t really handle anyone riding her for long periods of time but she’s happy enough to carry our bags as long as she gets enough food.”</p><p>She glances at him from the corner of her eyes, takes note of the clean shirt he’s wearing and the lack of mud on his trousers and still wet hair, as if he’d just washed it. Julie doesn’t know why, but the idea of him taking the time to wash his hair before seeing them -- <em>her </em>-- again makes her want to smile. Instead she nods her head, eyes going back to Bridget and giving her one last pat on the nose before taking a step back.</p><p>“And you didn’t steal her from someone?” She just wants to be perfectly clear on this point. Luke doesn’t turn to look at her when he speaks, but she watches him shake his head and she can see the corner of his lips twitch.</p><p>“I swear, we didn’t steal this horse,” Bridget pokes her nose into his hand again and Luke lets out a small laugh, clicking his tongue as he shakes his head at the horse, and then he turns around and looks at Julie, that half smile still on his face, idly she notices dark circles under his slightly red rimmed eyes. “Pass over your bag, once we’ve got it secured we can get going.”</p><p>Julie almost wants to say no, to declare she’ll carry her bags and doesn’t need his help. But she can see Flynn has already handed over their bag full of pans and dried meats, laughing as she talks to Alex about something. So Julie knows it would be silly of her to refuse. Plus, her second bag is <em>awfully </em>heavy.</p><p>Carefully, she slips the strap of the cloth bag containing food and her bedroll off her shoulder and hands it to Luke, grateful when their fingers don’t brush and he doesn’t ask for the bag across her body. She watches with mild curiosity as he attempts to attach it to Bridget, his fingers struggling with the ropes and straps until Reggie steps up to him, laughing and taking over.</p><p>“Will you be carrying your second bag, Lady?”</p><p>Julie jumps slightly at the sound of Willie’s voice, having forgotten he was standing next to her during her conversation with Luke and suddenly feeling self-conscious, though she doesn’t know why. It’s not like they had done anything wrong. Clasping a hand to the strap of her bag she shakes her head at him, trying to calm her racing heart with a small smile.</p><p>“I’ll carry it, thank you.” It takes a moment for Julie to realise how exactly he had addressed her and the way he stands with his hands behind his back like–– she furrowed her brows a little at him, considering before looking him straight in the eyes to say, “There’s no need for any titles or formalities. I’m just a simple farm girl. You can just call me Julie.”</p><p>For a moment she thinks he’s about to argue, but she assumes something in her eyes makes him reconsider. Instead he bows his head, just a little and gives her a smile that she can’t quite understand, “Very well… Julie.”</p><hr/><p>“So, what are your plans once you reach Marrae?” Reggie’s question surprises her, partly because she hadn’t heard him walk up to her side while she walked and partly because she didn’t expect them to really care about their plans. Nothing to do with the fact she still didn’t really <em>know </em>what her plans were. Julie wishes she’d spent a little more time planning her running away.</p><p>Glancing up at him she considers making something up. They’ll only be traveling together for three weeks at the most, after that she’ll never have to see them again. She doesn’t owe them any sort of explanation for her traveling to Marrae.</p><p>And yet.</p><p>There’s something quite–– <em><strong>endearing </strong></em>about the four of them. Julie couldn’t quite put her finger on it. They’ve only been traveling together less than a day but seeing how they all interact with each other, it is easy to see they’re <em>friends </em>and have been for a long time. They are all also kind. Which confuses her.</p><p>She finds it hard to comprehend that the Alex who had snuck up on them and pinned Flynn’s arms to her sides is the same Alex who, twenty minutes into their journey, found a kitten abandoned by the edge of the forest and has been carrying it ever since. (His name was either Fluffball or Mittens or Fredrick or Oak Leaf, after the tree he was found under, Julie was throwing her support behind Fredrick if only because Luke had suggested <em>Fluffball</em>.) In her mind she knows they’re bandits, that they stole and attacked them, but they’re also quite… sweet. It’s all very confusing.</p><p>Blowing out a breath, fingers tightening a little on the strap of her bag as she squints up at him, Julie decides to go with something close to the truth, “I’m not sure. I have… options, but I’m not sure which I’m going with. Perhaps the school? What about you four? Any grand plans?”</p><p>“We’re heading straight to the <em>Covington Club </em>and getting ourselves a slot in his Saturday showcase,” Reggie grins at her, walking a little ahead so he can turn to face her while walking backwards, “We’re going to show the city of Marrae what real music is. And once everyone knows our name there, we’ll move onto the next city and the next until everyone on the continent knows us.”</p><p>“Oh?” she laughs, raising an eyebrow at him, “And what exactly is your band called?”</p><p>Reggie opens his mouth and closes it just as quickly, frowning slightly as he turns back around to walk next to her, “We’re still working shopping that bit. But it doesn’t matter, because our music is going to show the world exactly who we are, it won’t even matter if we don’t have a band name. That’s what Luke says anyway,” he shoots a look over his shoulder and Julie follows his gaze to where Luke is walking next to Alex, Willie and Flynn, fingers wiggling at the kitten and saying something that makes even Flynn laugh. Julie smiles softly at the sight, brought back to her conversation with Reggie by him lightly bumping their shoulders, “Though between you and me, I think we should be called <em>The Reggets</em>.”</p><p>“That sounds a little like regrets, don’t you think?” Julie muses and lets out a light laugh at the pout that appears on his face.</p><p>“That’s exactly what Luke said,” he whines, hands in pushing into his pockets as he kicks at something on the ground and Julie doesn’t know how she feels about being on the same wavelength as Luke.</p><p>They talk some more and Julie learns that Reggie plays the bass but he really loves the fiddle and that he has known Alex and Luke since he was a child. Which makes sense, Julie thinks, they act as if they’ve known each other forever.</p><p>It strikes her again, how she’s lacked true, honest friendships in her life as they sit around the fire later that night, with them but also not a part of their group. The way they easily joke with each other, how they can communicate without seeming to need words, how even Flynn doesn't seem to have any issue joining their conversations.</p><p>Julie had never really considered that she was missing out on anything before. But sitting on the outskirts of their conversation she realises she has no idea how to interact within a group setting that doesn’t require her to smile and echo back the thoughts of people supposedly smarter than her. Here she can say whatever she wants, express her own thoughts and feelings on things, but where she finds talking like that to Flynn easy, she finds herself worrying at her nails when it comes to the boys.</p><p>Which makes no sense really, because she’s been fine talking to them one on one throughout the day. But inserting herself into the conversation about the best way to wash the sap out of Fredrick–Fluffball–Mittens–Oak Leafs fur suddenly feels terrifying. What if she says the wrong thing? Or she says the right thing and they feel awkward because she’s obviously correct and now they have to do what she says?</p><p>Flynn volunteers some of the soap she bought at the market and Willie suggests filling one of the pans with water and then Reggie waves a blanket around as the four of them gently try to detangle fur while Bridget tries to sneak closer to the fire. Julie just watches a little curiously, wondering what she could even do to help. She doesn’t even really know what a cat eats. Surely not apples. Maybe some of the dried meats? Pursing her lips she’s about to start searching through their collection of bags so she can feel at least a <em>little </em>helpful when hand reaches for them too.</p><p>“Oh,” she glances up to see Luke's hand frozen mid-reach and his eyes already on her, “Sorry do you want––?” she trails off, gesturing for him to go first.</p><p>But Luke shakes his head, retracing his arm and waving his hand at her, “No, no, you first.”</p><p>She doesn’t know why but Julie pushes one of the bags towards him, “No, honestly, after you.”</p><p>“No, I insist. Ladies first,” he pushes the bag back towards her and there’s something about the <em>way </em>he says it that just <strong>annoys </strong>her (if she thought about it, took a moment to examine it better, Julie would realise it’s because he sounds so very much like the lords sons and princes she has met over her life), so she pushes it back to him, hand lingering on the bag to try and stop him from pushing it back again.</p><p>“Well <em>I </em>insist on <em>you</em> going first.”</p><p>He tries to push the bag back to her, but she was prepared for that and adds pressure to keep it in place, watching his brows draw together in a frown. So he reaches for the strap instead, and Julie can see his plan. Pick the bag up and over to her. Well, she can’t let him do that. Her fingers move from the side of the bag and to the strap at the same time that his fingers wrap around it and their knuckles are brushing.</p><p>Julie glares up at him, until he blows out a breath and rolls his eyes at her, which is almost enough for her to change her stance on the matter and insist she <em>does </em>go first. But she lets her fingers slip away from the strap as he tightens his on it.</p><p>“Fine,” he breaths out, pulling the bag towards him and onto his knees, fingers pulling at the string keeping it closed, “What do you think a cat eats?”</p><p>The question startles a laugh out of her and she’s quick to clap a hand over her mouth as he frowns at her, a deep furrow between his brows and lips pursing as a hurt look crosses his face. Oh no, she didn’t mean to hurt his feelings.</p><p>“I’m sorry I’m not laughing <em>at </em>you, it’s just--” she giggles, shaking her head, “That’s the same question I was just asking myself.”</p><p>She watches his lips form a silent ‘oh’, quivering slightly as if he’s trying to fend off a smile before he shakes his head, looking back down at the bag to dig through it, “Do you think they like cheese?”</p><p>“I honestly have no idea,” her fingers itch to take the bag away from him, too look through it herself. There’s just something <em>about </em>him that makes her want to fight him on every point and she doesn’t understand why. No one has ever infuriated her quite so much just from speaking.</p><p>Sometimes she finds herself slipping into having a civil, almost pleasant conversation with him and catches herself. They might be nice to them right now, but they had still stolen from them. Julie was keeping up her walls and defences around them, if a life as a royal and at court had taught her anything it was to always be on her guard. Few people ever had pure intentions. She doubted a thief in the night did, no matter how kind his eyes might be.</p><hr/><p>Unfortunately her defences begin to crumble three nights later when the air turns unprecedentedly cold and even sitting almost in the fire does little to keep the chill from her bones. The only consolation she can find is that they’re <em>all </em>cold, not just her.</p><p>They move logs as close to the fire as they can and lay their bed rolls in the space left, each making themselves as comfortable as they can for a cold night. Flynn falls asleep with the top of her head resting against Julie’s legs, blanket and cloak pulled up to her chin, and she feels such a rush of affection for her friend. For how there is no hesitation in the way she sleeps so close to her, for how can apparently sleep through even the coldest spring nights.</p><p>Julie wishes she could sleep, but every time she lies down the cold from the ground seeps through her clothes and sends her into bouts of shivers. So she’s accepted her fate for the night, back against a log and knees drawn up to her chest as she watches the fire and her companions sleep. Her eyes drifted to the spot where Alex and Willie are wrapped in each other's arms, at the easy way they had fallen asleep together.</p><p>Julie isn’t sure if she’s envious of their ability to sleep, the way that they have each other or that they’re probably incredibly warm wrapped up like that. It’s probably a mix of all three she decides.</p><p>If traveling with them has taught her anything it’s that she longs for a relationship like that. One that is as easy as breathing. That makes her smile over the littlest things, like an apple cut up or an extra spoonful of terrible stew. And it’s how she knows she was right to leave.</p><p>Perhaps one day she could have grown to love whoever her husband was to be, but it would have always been an arrangement.</p><p>A business deal.</p><p>A part of her would always miss home, but she would never regret leaving. Not if it meant she had a chance to find that for herself.</p><p>“Can’t sleep?”</p><p>The whispered voice shocks her out of her thoughts and it takes her a moment to spot Luke across the fire from her, leaning up one elbow, head propped on his hand. She doesn’t know how long he’s been awake for, watching her.</p><p>“Too cold,” she says back quietly, not wanting to disturb the others from their slumber.</p><p>A frown crosses over his face, it’s small and Julie isn’t entirely sure she sees it with the way the flames and shadows dance across his face. He sits up fully and she watches with mild curiosity as he stands up and stumbles through the dark, whispering something she can’t quite make out as Bridget whines in the darkness. Her curiosity is growing to the point of asking a question when he returns to their dying circle of light with a bundle in his arms, pausing for a moment at his spot on the floor before turning back to her.</p><p>He steps over Reggie’s sleeping form, cat tucked carefully into the crook of his arm under the blanket and it's only when he’s a few inches away and Julie is tilting her head up to look at him with a furrowed brow that she recognises the blanket in his hands as the one he sleeps with.</p><p>Luke gently drapes it around her back and over her shoulders, tucking the front corners into her fingers already gripping her own blanket. The warmth of the fabric is already seeping into her by the time she fully understands what has happened and Luke is already back in his spot, unrolling another blanket.</p><p>“I--” she starts, voice stuttering in her throat at the simple gesture. Her mind whirling to try and understand the boy across from her.</p><p>“I really don’t understand you,” she breathes, and she hadn’t meant to utter it out loud, but she can clearly see the furrow between Lukes brows at the words.</p><p>“What?” He asks, pausing with his new blanket in his hands.</p><p>“You… you steal from us and then return a handful of apples and dried meats. And then you argue with me until the last available horse is lost to us but somehow turn up with one anyway. And I’m still not entirely convinced you didn’t steal Bridget by the way. And you--</p><p>“We won her in a bet,” he cuts her off. Julie blinks at him, not sure she fully heard him.</p><p>“What?”</p><p>“Bridget? We um,” he rubs at the back of his neck, one side of the blanket dropping to his lap at the movement as he lets out a small laugh, “God it’s stupid. We met his guy in the pub the night before we left and apparently he’d heard we were looking for a horse and he said he had one, but only if one of us could out drink him. Think he did it a lot by the way people rolled their eyes at him. But I’ve drank stronger stuff than they had there since I was fourteen and--” he trails off, looking up at her through the dying fire, “I felt bad. About scaring that other guy off when you were trying to buy that horse.”</p><p>Julie doesn’t know what to say to that. It had never occurred to her that there was a reason for his tired appearance that first morning or that they really had come by the horse honestly. All she can do is get out a small, “Oh.”</p><p>“And I don’t have a good explanation or reason about the whole apple thing. But I-- we really are sorry about it. About scaring you and for stealing from you,” there’s such a sincere tone in his voice that she wants to believe him.</p><p>“Look, I know we didn’t get off to a good start,” he shoots her a rueful smile and Julie can’t help but let her lips twitch up in one too, it definitely felt like an understatement, “But, I’d really like it if we could be friends. Or at least be civil. You’ve forgiven the boys enough to get along with them.”</p><p>Which was true, she had. She actually quite liked talking with them. And, if Julie was going to be honest, she liked talking to Luke too. In the moments when she forgot to keep him at a distance and distrust him.</p><p>“I can’t entirely promise I won’t still shout at you,” she starts because she stood by the fact there was a correct order to setting up a camp and it didn’t start with emptying all their bags of food on the ground, she can see him raising his brows slightly, “But I suppose being civil to each other wouldn’t be the worst thing.”</p><p>A smile stretches across his lips and Julie ducks her face slightly into her blanket and corners of his to hide her own. Being friends with him might not be the worst thing either, she thinks. Luke opens his mouth to say something but is cut off by a groan coming from where Alex and Willie are asleep and they both look over to see Alex waving a hand carelessly in the air.</p><p>“So glad you two have had a heart to heart, but would you please shut up now? Some of us are trying to sleep,” his words come out a little mumbled because he’s still half asleep and because he hasn’t moved his face from where it’s pressed into Willie’s chest, Julie assumes.</p><p>A slight flush fills her cheeks and her eyes dart to Luke who’s rolling his eyes at her, and she almost giggles. Instead she shakes her head and whispers, “Sorry Alex. Goodnight.”</p><p>The blonde mutters something that gets lost between his mouth and Willie’s chest and this time Julie does giggle, looking over at Luke who’s smiling fondly at his friend.</p><p>“Goodnight Julie,” he says as he looks back at her with a smile.</p><p>“Goodnight Luke.” She can’t quite be disappointed in herself for letting her walls crumble as she wraps Luke’s blanket a little tighter around her and finally falls asleep. Especially in the morning when he shrugs her off as she tries to return it to him.</p><hr/><p>For the most part, they do start to slowly become friends after their nighttime talk. At least they’re not quite so awkward with each other and Julie doesn’t argue with him over pointless things. But well, she sometimes just can’t help it. She would like to blame it on the others for leaving them in charge of the food while they were to fetch more water and fire wood.</p><p>It was a recipe for disaster really. Julie had never cooked anything more complicated then toast in her life and so far she had gotten away with simply passing people ingredients and observing. But the further they went and the more they all started to get long, the more they started taking turns at certain jobs. She didn’t think cooking was going to be her or Lukes forte.</p><p>Julie watches as Luke prods at the fish in the pan, nose wrinkling at the smell. Fish has never really been her favourite food unless it was covered in some type of sauce or fried like their cook did it. Whatever Luke was doing didn’t seem like either of those. She was still standing by the fact they were supposed to take the scales off.</p><p>She’s trying really hard not to comment on his cooking because she’s certainly never cooked a fish before. But watching him flip it over the utmost concentration in his face has her wanting to comment again. He had already snapped at her once for pointing out that he was using the wrong pan. Julie was trying very hard to uphold her side of their deal on being civil with each other.</p><p>Biting her lip she resits for a moment longer before leaning forward on her log by the fire so she’s not in her peripheral vision anymore.</p><p>“Isn’t it too soon to flip it?”</p><p>“No,” his eyes don’t even flicker over to her but she notices his jaw tense. Just a little.</p><p>“Are you sure?” She shuffles forwards a little more until she’s only just still sitting.</p><p>Luke turns to look at her then, raising an eyebrow as he gestures at the pan, “Do you want to take over?”</p><p>It feels like a challenge. One that he doesn’t expect her to accept. Or maybe he <em>does </em>want her to accept it so he can get out of ruining their dinner. Well, jokes on him because she has no intentions of ruining their dinner. All she has to do is keep it from burning, right?</p><p>“Yes.” She gets up from her seat and takes the single step that puts her by his side, kneeling down next to him and prying the slightly burnt spoon they use for all their cooking from his fingers. Julie ignores the way the cold seeps through her skirts and into her knees but how the right side of her body is warm from where it’s almost pressed against Lukes side. He almost feels warmer than the fire.</p><p>Frowning at the pan she tries to decide what to do now that she’s here. Her impulse is to flip it back over, but she doesn’t want to give him the satisfaction of being right if she’s wrong. So she pushes it around the pan instead, nose wrinkling again at the hissing sounds. Perhaps they should have bought spices or something before they left. She’s pretty sure there’s maybe some salt in one of their bags. How do they even know when it’s <em>done</em>?</p><p>“You don’t know what to do either, do you?” Luke’s voice whispers past her ear and she hopes that the shiver that runs up her spine can be blamed on the mild chill in the air. Turning her head a fraction to glance at him, eye trailing over his face, Julie suddenly realises this is the closest they’ve been to each other since that first night they had met. She’s struck again by his eyes. How they’re earnest and kind and open and how when he smiles they actually seem to light up a little. And how they’re staring at her so intently she can almost see little specks of blue merging with the green in his eyes. She stands by her earlier thoughts, he does have very nice eyes.</p><p>“I’d say I know more than you,” she breaths, raising her chin a little, like her governess had taught her too, so she can look down on him, and, because it feels right, she flips the fish.</p><p>Luke lets out a small chuckle, his mouth open with a retort only to be cut off by the sounds of their friends returning. He leans back, a rueful smile on his face before he moves to the log that she had vacated. Julie hadn’t realised she was anticipating his reply, their teasing back and forth, until she didn’t get it.</p><p>“Julie, I think--” Flynn frowns at the pan as she comes into the circle of light produced by the fire shaking her head, “I think that’s burning?”</p><p>“Oh crap,” she mutters, eyes darting back to the pan and the smoke curling into the air and the distinct smell of something burning. Turning the fish over as quickly as she can Julie blows out a breath at the charred side, throwing a glare as she hears Luke trying to stifle a laugh.</p><p>“Why didn’t you take the scales or skin off?” Willie asks peering over her shoulder and perhaps the fish had burnt on her watch but she wasn’t totally at fault here.</p><p>“I told you!” She points at Luke with the spoon, eyes wide and secretly pleased at the flush on his face as he throws his hands into the air, looking around at his friends.</p><p>“I never said I knew what I was doing. I’ve never cooked a fish before,” there’s a meaningful look thrown at the three boys that she doesn’t understand but has them nodding.</p><p>Blowing out a sigh Julie hears Willie mutter something about ‘idiots’ and ‘why did I agree to run away’ and ‘lordlings’. Her mouth opens to comment, but then he’s gently taking the spoon from her and salvaging their food.</p><p>She had known, in the back of her mind, that there was a possibility that they had run away too, little moments and comments that she’d picked up on. And that there were secrets they were keeping.</p><p>A part of Julie longed to ask all the questions on the tip of her tongue about what his mutterings meant but. Willie also clearly knew she was keeping a secret too. Had known since that first morning.</p><p>And he hadn't asked. She could do them the same courtesy, she supposed. Though, she really did hate not knowing something.</p><hr/><p>“What day is it do you think?” She asks Luke as they walk side by side a short distance behind the others, she’s holding the guide rope attached to Bridget's bridle loosely in one hand as she tries to do some maths in her head.</p><p>“Uh a Thursday, maybe?”</p><p>Julie knows he’s looking at her curiously as she nods her head. She’d thought it was. Which meant it had been nearly sixteen days since she had run away. It hadn’t occurred to her at the time, with some much going on and her emotions already so high, how close it was to the anniversary of her mother's death.</p><p>It would be four years soon. Four years since the last time she saw her smile, held her hand, told her she loved her. Four years since she had sat at her bedside and promised to look out for Carlos, to learn to smile again even if it felt impossible. Four years since they had last sat at the piano and sang together.</p><p>What would she think, her mother, if she could see her now? So far from her home and her family, with strangers for company and protection?</p><p>She has a vague memory, blurry by age and childhood, of reading one of the fairytale books she had loved so much. Of jumping on her bed as her mother laughed and pulled her into her lap. Little Julie had talked excitedly about all the adventures she was going to go on, of the sights she would see and the people she would meet. It had been before she was told who to be, and her role in life. It had been when she was still allowed to dream of who she wanted to be.</p><p>Her mother had listened to her babble on, she thinks, Julie can remember her smiling and kissing her cheek. And whispering something as she drifted to sleep, something important she thinks, but she can’t remember.</p><p>She can’t really remember her mothers voice at all anymore. The thought hits her suddenly and forcefully, knocking the air out of her lungs as she stumbles a step, gentle hands on her elbow and shoulder steadying her.</p><p>Blinking, Julie tries to clear her mind of the fog that took over. Of the memories and sudden realisations.</p><p>“Are you okay?” Luke's voice cuts through the last remnants of the fog, his head ducked down so he can peer into his face, eyes full of concern that makes Julie want to cry.</p><p>“I--” she starts, voice cracking on the single syllable and she closes her and breathes in. The breath she blows out in a little shaky and she knows the smile she forces onto her lips does little to convince him of her next words, “I’m fine. I just realised something, is all.”</p><p>“Do you want to talk about it?” he asks quietly.</p><p>The question surprises her though she’s not sure why. Over the last few days Julie has seen the way he cares about his friends, seen how he notices small things, seen how he reaches out with reassurance and comfort over silly mistakes like spilt water. Seen how, even when they weren’t close to friends, he had given her a blanket when she was cold. Luke cares about people more then anyone she’s ever met. But does she want to tell him about the thing that almost broke her? Julie isn’t sure she’s ready to spill her heart out like that just yet.</p><p>“Not right now,” she tries and it seems good enough for him by the way he squeezes her elbow slightly before letting go.</p><p>“Okay.”</p><p>After a few minutes of walking Julie quietly starts to hum to herself, one of the songs she used to sing with her mother that always made her dad grin widely. It’s a folk song from one of the coastal towns of Stornoway she thinks, something her mother had picked up somewhere along the way and given to her. She remembers spinning around and around the family dinning room as she sang until she was giggling and dizzy and leaning against her mothers legs as she sang the last lines to her.</p><p>It’s not her mother singing now though. Julie turns her head as Luke carries the song on despite her no longer humming the tune.</p><p>
  <em>If my true love she'll not come</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Then I'll surely find another</em>
</p><p>
  <em>To pull wild mountain mountain thyme</em>
</p><p>
  <em>All around the bloomin' heather</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Will ye go, lassie, go?</em>
</p><p>The words sound different when he sings them, a slight accent coating his words that she hadn’t noticed before or perhaps that he had never let through before. She realises then, that she's never heard him sing, or any of them. Though she knows their plan once they reach Marrae. As he sings through the chorus again though, Julie thinks they’ll have no problems being noticed.</p><p>
  <em>And we'll all go together</em>
</p><p>
  <em>To pull wild mountain thyme</em>
</p><p>
  <em>All around the bloomin' heather</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Will ye go, lassie, go?</em>
</p><p>He finally looks at her for the last line, eyebrows wiggling slightly as he nods his head to the left and further into the woods and it’s enough to make her laugh, shaking her head a little at him. And maybe that was his plan, because there’s something a little like relief in his eyes as he smiles at her. She wants to thank him, but she thinks the smile she gives him in return might be enough for now.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>i really don't know why this took me so long to write but i got there in the end! i swear, idk how these chapters get so long, im sorry. ALSO just in case anyone was wondering they're walking the equivalent of copenhagen to paris so it's gonna take 'em a while, they're like, outskirts of germany rn. </p><p>the song is Wild Mountain Thyme and if you want to listen to it i'd suggest The Corries version (there's an emily blunt and jamie dornan version because of their new film and it's...okay but not the vibes fhdjs) </p><p>thank you so much to everyone whos commented and kudo you're all amazing and i'm send many hugs in your directions!<br/>anyway!!!<br/>i hope you're all staying safe in these hard times.<br/>hope you enjoyed! comments and kudos are appreciated!! mwah xox<br/>you can also find me on <a href="https://tangledstarlight.tumblr.com/">tumblr</a>! come talk to me about random things!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>this is technically chapter 4 part 1, because it was just getting longer and longer as in. this is 4k and it's even the main part of the chapter so! the second part should be up later this week though fingers crossed</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p></p><blockquote>
  <p>
    <strike>
      <em>once upon a time there was a girl who tried to write and who thought she could mend torn cloth with sheer will and who so desperately longed for a meal that wasn’t fish...</em>
    </strike>
  </p>
</blockquote><p>Julie taps her pencil on the page of her notebook but her attention has wandered away from the words she was trying to get down and over to the lake they’d opted to stop by the night before. It had been nothing but a depthless dark circle last night as they’d set up their camp and she’d spent most of her night worrying one of them might accidentally walk into it.</p><p>But now the sun is starting to rise, rays just peaking over the horizon and letting her catch little glimpses of what the little lakeside clearly looks like when the sun is shining on it. Beautiful and peaceful, she wonders if the water would be slightly warmer in an afternoon?</p><p>“Why are you up so early?” Flynn’s words, uttered around a yawn, make her startle, head whipping around to see the other woman now leaning against the tree Julie had been sitting under for the last hour.</p><p>Placing a hand over her speeding heart, Julie shuffles over on the blanket she’s spread out so Flynn can sit down too. It isn’t the first time one of them has caught her unawares and Julie <em>knows </em>she needs to pay better attention to her surroundings, one of these days it’s not going to be someone friendly.</p><p>“I just couldn’t sleep,” she says with a light shrug, closing her pencil within the pages of her notebook and folding her hands on the top and letting her eyes slide over to Flynn, “Why are <em>you </em>up?”</p><p>Flynn wrinkles her nose and nods towards the lake, “I was going to bathe before the others woke up, but now I’m thinking I made a bad call because that water looks cold.”</p><p>“Well, it was fairly cold last night,” Julie agrees, bumping their shoulders together as they both look out over the lake and the creeping sun. “How much further do you think it is till we reach a town again?”</p><p>She missed sleeping in a bed, even the hard uncomfortable ones in the rundown inns they’d stayed at during the first half of their journey. Sleeping on the hard ground each night was really starting to hurt her back, and that wasn’t even mentioning how much she longed to strip all her clothes off and wear something <em>clean</em>. Maybe if they had a spare day she could attempt to wash her dress but–– well she wasn’t actually sure how long a dress took to dry, and was worried about causing damage to the material. There’s a small tear on the hem of her skirt that she’s been keeping a careful eye on, as soon as that gets bigger Julie knows it’ll be time to change. Into the trousers and shirt stuffed in the bottom of her bag, and that she had been avoiding for several days now. </p><p>“Willie said we’re still a few days out from the end of the forest completely, but there’s a commonly used camp ground that we should reach by tonight if we’re lucky. They might not have a warm bath but hopefully we’ll have some new company other than those four.” Flynn peers over her shoulder and around the side of the tree where Julie can picture their four companions still sleeping peacefully.</p><p>“Well that’s a relief. They’re awfully dull company,” Julie laughs quietly at her own joke, she’s not sure she’s ever met a group of people more full of life and humour.</p><p>“Glad we decided to… tag along, as Reggie put it?” Flynn’s brows shoot up as she asks the question and Julie is reminded of how very against all this she had been.</p><p>“I suppose it hasn’t been all that bad,” she concedes, “Though I do think Luke is incredibly insufferable.”</p><p>Flynn lets out a short laugh, shaking her head and Julie frowns at her, thoroughly confused about what she might have said to cause such a reaction.</p><p>“What?”</p><p>“You might call him ‘<em>insufferable</em>’ but the two of you spend an awful lot of our walking time talking to each other. An awful lot of laughing and smiling going on. It seems to me that you’re <em>quite </em>happy to suffer his company.”</p><p>“That’s––” she stutters, feeling heat rush to her cheeks and tries desperately to hide it behind her loose curls. Oh she didn’t have a good explanation or an excuse for that. Because well, she did quite like talking to him. And it was incredibly annoying. Julie had been perfectly content with merely acknowledging his presence, and then he’d given her his blanket and sang to her and there was the shirt he’d ripped up for them when Flynn’s monthly courses had arrived early but–– she still knew they were <em>hiding </em>something and it was becoming a lot harder to remember that fact.</p><p>The feeling of Flynn’s shoulder moving with suppressed laughter against her own draws her attention back to the present and she blows out a breath, watching one curl float into the air before landing back on her face. Was this considered <em>girl talk</em> she wondered? If it was, shouldn't they be doing it under the cover of darkness? Tucking her hair back behind her ears Julie finally looks back at Flynn.</p><p>“Okay, perhaps I don’t find him <em>insufferable</em>. But––” she bites her lip, lets her hands wave aimlessly around her knees as she shrugs, “Oh I don’t know Flynn! I suppose I do quite like talking to him. But they stole from us and they’re <em>clearly </em>hiding something and in a month at least I’ll probably never see any of them again. It seems silly to get attached.”</p><p>“You know you can just enjoy someone's company, it doesn’t have to mean anything? That’s what friendships are all about! Plus, I’m sure some have started on worse footing then a little apple stealing,” she pauses, giving her a look that Julie doesn’t understand until the next words leave her mouth, “And well… <em>you’re</em> also keeping quite a big secret from them, <strong><em>Julie</em></strong>.”</p><p>Julie feels her shoulders tense, back straightening on impulse as she stops herself from glancing behind the tree to check the others are still asleep.</p><p>“<em>That</em> is different!”</p><p>Flynn looks about to say something else, her mouth partly open and eyes searching, but whatever she finds on Julie’s face has her shaking her head, “I suppose it is.”</p><p>A slightly tense silence settles over them as the sun makes its last push into the sky and Julie starts to worry that maybe she’s pushed to far and this will be the end of their friendship and she’ll have to spend the rest of this journey in an awkward silence with Flynn and–– Flynn blows out a sigh, arms stretching above her head before she stands up.</p><p>“Okay, I’m going to brave the water. Will you keep an eye on those four for me?” She nods her head back towards the boys, holding out a hand to help her up.</p><p>“Yes, of course,” Julie agrees, quick to put her notebook down beside her and accept Flynn’s offered hand. She’s not entirely sure what happens next, perhaps she stands on the hem of her skirt, or it catches on an unseen branch or maybe it’s karma for snapping at Flynn.</p><p>But as she stands the sound of fabric tearing fills the silence between them. Julie’s grip tightens on Flynn’s hand, both of their eyes wide as they look down at the rip going from the hem of her skirt to halfway up her leg.</p><p>“Oh fuck,” she whispers, quick to release Flynns hand and bend to try and inspect the damage better. She holds the two sections of fabric apart and pushes them together, as if they will magically reattach themselves. Of course they don’t, the two frayed edges stay apart. Even if she had a needle and thread, Julie isn’t sure if she could fix this.</p><p>“Maybe we can fix it?” Flynn suggests, biting her lip as Julie stands up, releasing the fabric and watching it sway around her legs.</p><p>“Only if you happen to have bought a needle and thread with you. And if you know how to fix a rip,” she pouts a little, sticking her leg out through the gap in her skirts and pulling it back in. She’d like to assume stitching and embroidery were similar enough she could do it, but her assumptions haven’t always worked out all that well for her.</p><p>Blowing out a sigh Julie shoots Flynn a smile, “It’s fine, I suppose I’ll just have to get used to wearing trousers. Hopefully they’ll be someone at the camp ground who can sew, or I can buy a skirt from.”</p><p>She’d never worn second hand clothes before, that would certainly be a new experience.</p><hr/><p>One of the plus sides of the dress she’d picked to run away in was that the corset wasn’t actually attached to the rest of the dress and its dark blue colour went quite nicely with the white of the shirt and the black of the trousers. She might have been a princess on the run whose hair had seen better days, but at least she was still somewhat fashionable.</p><p>Sliding her legs into the trousers, it takes her a moment to get used to the feeling before she’s tucking her chesmies and shirt in, fiddling a little with the buttons before doing them up. She twists her hips, frowning as all the material moves with her.</p><p>“Can you pass me the belt too?” She ask Flynn over her shoulder, who's trying to shove the rest of her dismantled dress into her bag.</p><p>“Is there a reason you have so many hair ribbons?” Flynn huffs behind her and Julie turns to see her untangled two of said ribbons from the buckle of her belt and she flushes a little.</p><p>“I just wanted to be prepared,” she mutters, taking the belt from her friends hands, “Thanks.”</p><p>Fastening the belt across her hips and tucking the edge of her corset in she finally turns around to face Flynn, hands raising up in the air a little, “How do I look?”</p><p>“Different. But a good different,” Flynn says quickly, dropping her bag to the ground with a small thud and walking over to her, fingers straightening her shirt and moving curls out of her face, “It suits you.”</p><p>Julie blows out a breath and smiles at Flynn, grateful for the reassurance and well, all the help she’d been supplying. But she isn’t quite sure how to express that just yet in words, so instead she catches the other woman's hands in her own and squeezes tightly, once, before letting go. Without her skirts to hide her purse of coins and jewels she opts to simply hide it under the layers of fabric in her bag, pulling the strap over her head and letting its weight settle against her hip. It’s a fair bit heavier now, but she’ll manage.</p><p>The boys have packed up most of their rudimentary camp and Alex is in the process of shooing the cat away from the food they’ve clearly left out for them when they return.</p><p>“Oh good there you guys are back, we -- <em>huh</em>,” Reggie starts, only looking up from where he’s refastening his boots half way through his sentence, head tilting to the side as he looks at them and Julie suddenly feels self conscious about everything.</p><p>“What?” She doesn’t <em>mean </em>to sound so defensive, but well. She is a little defensive. “I tore my dress and this was my only other option.”</p><p>It's not like a woman wearing trousers was considered <em>scandalous </em>it was just... not very common. Julie knew this, knew she was perfectly presentable and respectable. She would say as much to the four of them if they even so much as uttered a word. </p><p>“Nothing! Just--” This time Reggie gets cut off by the sound of Luke apparently choking on the gulp of water he’d just taken, eyes wide as he looks at her.</p><p>And even from where she’s stood across the small clearing Julie can see the way his eyes sweep down her body, once, twice. Before landing somewhere just over her shoulder, a faint flush on his cheeks and Julie crosses her arms over her chest, unsure if she’s still feeling defensive or self-conscious or flattered.</p><p>Reggie clears his throat, throwing a look at Luke that involved a lot of eyebrow movement before turning a smile towards her and Flynn, “We saved you some food. We should get going soon, Willie says we should be able to make it to the best camping spot before nightfall.”</p><hr/><p>She can hear the camp before she sees it. Peoples laughter echoing through the trees, children squealing and pots clashing. Julie’s not sure what they’re cooking but it smells a lot nicer than all the meals they’ve made. Idly, she wonders if they look pathetic enough, if someone will offer to share with them.</p><p>That’s what people did right? Travellers in the woods, meeting at communal camping stops, sharing tales and food. At least that’s what she thinks they do. She’s pretty sure she read about that somewhere.</p><p>Before she can think more about how to politely request they share their food, a flash of grey fur darts between her legs, and with no skirts in the way Julie doesn’t even get a chance to try and stop him.</p><p>All at once they’re all shouting out a different name as the kitten races ahead of them,</p><p>“Oak leaf! “</p><p>“Fredrick!”</p><p>“Fluffball!”</p><p>“Mittens!”</p><p>To the little creature's credit, he pauses just in the entrance to the clearing, looking back at them with a tilted head and twitching ears. Alex brushes past her in a huff of breath, sweeping the little cat up into his arms and muttering something that she can’t hear.</p><p>“We’ve really got to figure out what name he answers too,” Willie sighs but there’s a fond look on his face as he watches Alex and the cat.</p><p>“Why? You don’t think calling out all four names is going to be strategic in the long run?” She teases, at least she hopes it comes out teasing. It’s something she’s been working on. Telling jokes, teasing tones, sarcastic comments. She really likes a sarcastic comment.</p><p>“Just trying to save my voice for when I have to shout at the boys,” Willie says, shooting her a smile and rolling his eyes towards Luke and Reggie fussing over something on Bridget's saddle.</p><p>“Ah, that’s a good point,” she agrees, eyes lingering for a second too long on them. On their easy smiles and playful back and forth. She tears her eyes away and back to Willie who’s still watching her, still smiling in a way that makes her think he knows something. “I still think Fredrick suits him best.”</p><p>“Mittens is obviously the best name,” Flynn says joining the conversation from her other side, one arm gesturing ahead of them, “Look at him, it’s like he’s got little socks on!”</p><p>“Are we talking about the cat's name again?” Luke calls over and Julie has to stop herself from rolling her eyes, already knowing what he’s about to say, “The other cats will bully him if he’s called <em>Mittens</em>, I won’t let that happen.”</p><p>“Oh, and they’re not going to bully him if he’s called <em>Fluffball</em>?” She turns around, hanging back for two steps until she's not so much shouting at him, as talking at a regular volume and starts walking backwards as she raises an eyebrow at him, unable to resit rolling her eyes at the nudge Reggie throws into his side.</p><p>“I--” he starts, a furrow appearing between his brows as though it’s a thought that’s only just occurred to him, “Okay, you may have a point there.”</p><p>Julie grins and opens her mouth to respond when she stumbles a step, can feel herself falling backwards and squeezes her eyes shut in preparation for the ground to hit her back. But she never feels the pain of the ground catching her, instead there’s a pair of arms around her shoulders, holding her up.</p><p>There’s a moment, a heartbeat, before she opens her eyes where she’s expecting to see green eyes looking down at her, a little concerned with his brows drawn together but his lips quirked up with a teasing comment on his tongue.</p><p>So when she opens her eyes to meet blue she tries very desperately to keep her disappointment off her face. Which isn’t hard, because she doesn’t recognise the person holding her up and fear sets in quickly as she pulls herself away from the strangers grasp.</p><p>“I--” she starts, taking a half step backwards until she’s stood by Flynn’s side, breath rushing out of her. “Thank you, I--” Julie has no idea what to say, just outright demanding who he is doesn’t exactly seem polite.</p><p>“Hey, are you okay?”</p><p>She turns at the sound of Luke’s voice next to her shoulder, only a little startled by his appearance -- she’s getting much better at being aware of where Luke is in correspondence with herself, she just has to try and apply those skills to the wider populace and stop getting startled by Bridget demanding apples. His hand hovers just next to her elbow, and even though he’s not touching her Julie can still feel the heat from his skin.</p><p>“I’m fine,” she reasures him with a small smile, pleased that she’d been correct about the look of concern she’d pictured on his face. “Thanks to…” she trails off, turning back to the blonde haired stranger who’s watching them with an inquisitive look.</p><p>“Oh! Nick, that’s me. My name is Nick,” he stumbles out with a smile, apparently unfazed by his jumbled sentence. “You guys heading to stad stad?”</p><p>“Stad stad?” Flynn asks with a small frown, and Julie’s glad she’s not alone in being confused.</p><p>“It’s uh what us regulars call the camping ground, it means--” Nick starts, one hand gesturing over his shoulder to where she can see people milling about, tents and campfires.</p><p>“Rest stop,” Luke cuts in, a strange look on his face as he watches Nick. “It means rest stop. Last one before you head into the thick of the forest and first one after you come out of it, right?”</p><p>“Yeah! You been here before?” If Nick notices the slight animosity coming from Luke he doesn’t seem about to mention it and Julie uses the distraction of Nick leading them into the camp to nudge Luke in his side, eyebrows shooting up as she looks at him.</p><p>Luke looks down at her, a slight pout already on his lips and he shrugs one shoulder, stepping out of range of her elbow as Reggie catches up to them, Bridget forcing her way between them too.</p><p>“Have we made a new friend?” Reggie asks, looking between the two of them and the back of Nick’s head.</p><p>“Apparently,” Luke mutters and Julie rolls her eyes at him. It’s moments like these that she really does find him insufferable and hard to understand. Nick hasn't done anything wrong, what is his problem? With a huff she walks away from them to catch up with Flynn and Willie who are still talking to Nick about the camp ground.</p><p>“––stop every year on our way through to Stornoway. Hope you guys don’t mind music, we tend to get a little wild on our last night before the long walk,” he says with a laugh, eyes darting between the three of them quickly before he looks away, bringing them to a stop before the first tent in the clearing. “Set yourselves up wherever you find space. And my dad would kill me if I didn’t invite you all to come eat with us tonight.”</p><p>“That’s kind of you but—“ Luke starts, leaning against Bridget's side as he smiles too politely at Nick and Julie already knows he’s about to decline the offer and she is <em>not</em> having that.</p><p>“We’d absolutely love to––”</p><p>“–– we have plenty of food––”</p><p>“––to join you and your family.” Julie finishes, glaring at Luke who’s already looking at her, eyes wide and offended over something she can’t even begin to fathom.</p><p>Luke raises an eyebrow as he looks at her, tries to cross his arms only to realise doing so would hit Bridget and changing tactics to placing one hand on his hip, head not so subtly nodding in Nick's direction. Julie just frowns at him, crossing her hands over her chest –– only partly out of a petty need to prove she could while he couldn’t –– and waits to see if he’s going to use his words. It’s the first time she hasn’t minded not understanding his secret non-verbal language. Luke may have some unspoken problem with Nick, but Julie is sick of their terrible cooking.</p><p>She doesn’t know how to say that in eyebrows or nods, so she just glares at him a little harder and hopes it gets the point across.</p><p>“Um so was that a yes or a no?” Nick asks from somewhere behind her, but Julie is worried if she turns away from Luke now he’ll do something stupid. Like refuse again.</p><p>“Ignore them,” Alex says, and Julie can almost see the way he’s rolling his eyes at them, “We’d love to join you for dinner. None of us are that great at cooking,” he confesses, which is quickly followed by a tiny meow of apparent agreement.</p><p>Their voices drift off into the background and in a vague way Julie knows they’re still talking, that their friends are asking probably very important questions, but she can’t seem to tear her eyes away from Luke. Her only solace is that Luke can’t seem to tear his away from hers either. She’s not even really sure what they’re trying to convey anymore.</p><p>“I hate to interrupt whatever...<em>this</em> is,” Flynn’s voice and gentle hand on her forearm makes her jump, head swivelling quickly to peer into brown eyes and it takes her an awfully long few seconds to register what she’s saying. “Nick says one of the girls should be able to help us either mend your dress or have something else you can wear.”</p><p>“Right, right,” she breathes, eyes darting back to Luke only to find him already gone. Julie refuses to take the time to examine the slight sinking feeling in her stomach and looks back at Flynn, forcing a smile onto her face, “Excellent. Did he say who?”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>so yknow in the last chapter when i said i didn't know where the cat came from? yeah apply that same sentence to nick, because i have no idea where he showed up from either ghfjd i had 0 intentions of him being in this story. </p><p>i know not much really happened here, but the next part has some of my favourite scenes in so i hope that makes up for it!! </p><p>thank you to everyones whose commented or left kudos, you're all super lovely and amazing i'm glad you're enjoying this ride with me 💜💜</p><p>anyway!!!<br/>i hope you're all staying safe in these hard times my loves.<br/>hope you enjoyed! comments and kudos are very much appreciated!! mwah xox<br/>you can also find me on <a href="https://tangledstarlight.tumblr.com/"></a>tumblr where i post vague writing updates of me slowly loosing the plot!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. chapter 5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>i would just like to apologise in advance for how long this is. but also, lets all be glad i cut it in half otherwise it would have been a 9k chapter 😊</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    
<p></p><blockquote>
  <p>
    <strike>
      <em>once upon a time there was a girl who spun and spun until the world blurred around her and got lost in a moment that she fears she’ll never recapture.</em>
    </strike>
  </p>
</blockquote><p>“You’ve not been taking very good care of this have ya?” The brunette clicks her tongue as she inspects her dress, pulling at the fabric and running her finger over the stained hem and fraying edges with clear disapproval.</p>
<p>Julie is strongly reminded of when she was eleven and spent an afternoon running through the gardens with Maria at her side and when she’d returned to her rooms to change before dinner her governess had tutted and complained about the state of her dress. She hadn’t liked being told off then and she doesn’t like it anymore now. But she bites her tongue because she really needs some help to fix her dress.</p>
<p>“We’ve been on the road for a while,” she says, forcing a polite smile and ignoring the way Flynn turns away to hide her laughter into her shoulder. “Can you fix it?”</p>
<p>“Hm,” she murmurs spending a few more seconds inspecting her dress before putting it down on the table which takes up most of the space in her tent, a small cot and chest barely leaving enough room for the three of them to stand in. “You’d be better with a whole new dress.”</p>
<p>She feels her smile freezing on her face, lips slowly falling down into a frown because she’s always known in the back of her mind that it would be a <em>possibility </em>that they wouldn’t be able to fix it but… well no one had ever not been able to fix something for her before. She didn’t like it. Blowing out a breath Julie folds her arms across her chest and tilts her head at the woman.</p>
<p>“Do you have anything for um sale? Or can you direct me to someone who might?”</p>
<p>Clearly she’s said the right thing because the woman –– Andrea, Julie reminds herself, Nick had called her Andrea –– grins, sweeping her hair over one shoulder and clapping her hands together in one smooth movement it stuns her for a moment.</p>
<p>“Oh I have the perfect thing for you! Now, it’s not a dress,” Andrea turns around to open the lid of a wooden chest and from this distance all Julie can see is bright colours and is halfway to opening her mouth when the woman talks again, “But, it’ll go lovely with your shirt and be a lot easier to move around in that old thing.”</p>
<p>Julie wanted to point out that the dress wasn’t that old and that she didn’t <em>need </em>something that was easier to move around in, she was perfectly happy with her heavy skirts. But, it <em>might </em>be nice to not have to pick up quite so much fabric every time she needs to climb over a fallen branch and there must be some benefits about not wearing a full dress and only the skirts of one? At the very least it would help her blend in more. And anything would be preferable to the trousers.</p>
<p>“Ah, here we go!” There’s a rustle of fabric and then she’s pulling out something russet coloured in one hand and something embroidered with flowers in the other, waving them slightly through the air before turning a wide smile on the two of them. “Now, you don’t <em>need </em>the corset, but I do think it adds a little...something to the outfit. Doesn’t make it quite so plain, you know? Unless you like plain.”</p>
<p>A small frown started to form on Julie's face at the woman’s words, she had been called many things in life but <em>plain </em>was not one of them, nor did she ever expect it to be. Occasionally boring, sure, especially when she didn’t want to join the others her age at scandal ridden parties or opted to perform only classics when asked for a song. But never plain. She very much liked glitter and jewels and things that shined. <em>Plain</em>! It was nearly enough to make her scoff in response.</p>
<p>“How much?” she asked, already pulling at the strap of her bag to find her purse.</p>
<p>“If you’ll let me keep the dress for material, I can sell ‘em for three silver pieces.”</p>
<p>In all honesty Julie didn’t know if that was a good deal or not, she’d never bought a dress herself before, and a quick look at Flynn’s face said she didn’t know either. Blowing out a breath she pulled out three silver pieces and tilted her head slightly.</p>
<p>“May I borrow your tent to change? Please.”</p>
<p>“Of course, I’ll put these here. Shout if you need any help,” and then she was leaving, canvas door dropping behind her and sealing Julie and Flynn into semi-darkness.</p>
<p>“Do you think she lied about being able to fix the rip?” Julie asks, fingers undoing the buckle of her belt and already pulling at the laces on her corset as her eyes roamed around the tent with a small pout on her lips, “Also, I’m starting to realise we should have perhaps bought a tent of some kind instead of all those pans.”</p>
<p>“Probably, but I doubt either of us know enough about dress maintenance to make a convincing argument,” Flynn shrugs, moving carefully through the space to look through the Andrea’s things, wrinkling her nose a little as she looks back up at her, “Yes well… the boys didn’t think to buy a tent either.”</p>
<p>Julie can’t help but smile at that, ducking her head as she pulls the trousers off her legs, and holds up the skirt. It’s a lot lighter than anything she’s worn before, with no extra skirts or fabric underneath, but it feels studier then her dress, the material closer to the canvas of the tent then the soft cotton she’s used to and it scratches a little as she steps into it. But she’s sure it will do.</p>
<p>She hums quietly to herself as she tucks her shirt into her skirt, adjusting the collar a little so it’s sitting just off her shoulders, before slipping her arms through the straps of the corset, gathering the laces at the back and pulling as tight as she can before turning her attention to the front. Wrinkling her nose a little as she starts fastening hooks and tightening laces, she’s never liked corsets like this. Or, correction, she’s never actually had to fasten one like this before which is why she’s never liked them. Though, she is pretty sure once it’s tightened at the back she won't have to fuss with it again.</p>
<p>“Flynn could you…” she trails off as she peers over her shoulder, eyes darting down to her back and back up to her friend with a wince. She’s never really worried about asking someone for help getting dressed before but that was before and this was now.</p>
<p>“Oh, sure.” Flynn puts down the comb she was examining and pushes lightly on Julie’s shoulder to get her to face the back of the tent.</p>
<p>“Do you think it’s too much to expect a meal that isn’t stew?” Julie wonders allowed, rocking a little on her feet as Flynn pulls at the laces once, twice.</p>
<p>“I’ll be happy with anything that isn’t boiled or fish,” Flynn sighs and Julie can’t help but laugh. Their meals have consisted of a <em>lot </em>of fish, which might not have been so bad if any of them really know what to do with one.</p>
<p>“Perhaps we should start boiling fish, I’m sure you’d love it.”</p>
<p>Flynn pulls tighter at her laces, causing her to shuffle back a half step and Julie laughs again, louder this time as she shoots a wide smile over her shoulder at Flynn, whose lips are pursed as she tries to keep her own laughter at bay. With one more tug she steps back, tilting her head a little to the side as she inspects her work.</p>
<p>“Does it feel too tight?”</p>
<p>Julie breaths out, breaths in, rolls her shoulders and turns to face her friend with a shake of her head, “No, it’s perfect. Thank you.”</p>
<p>Picking her belt up from the ground and securing it again around her waist gives her a sense of safety that she doesn’t really understand but is going to chalk up to it being the last piece of her ensemble that is <em>hers</em>. Everything else from her old life feels a little like it’s slipping away from her, but as long as she keeps ahold of this belt it’s a reminder of who she used to be. Which is silly, she knows, because she ran away because she didn’t <em>want </em>to be that person. Shaking her head and the thoughts away she looks back at Flynn, the scene mirroring that of the one they’d had that very morning.</p>
<p>“What do you think?” She asks, one hand bunching in the skirt as she gives a small twirl.</p>
<p>“Much more like yourself,” she smiles and Julie blows out a breath because she <em>feels</em> more like herself too. There’s nothing wrong with trousers of course, but she much prefers the comfort of her legs being hidden from the world so she can sit or stand however she pleases.</p>
<p>“Oh good I-- Oh,” she starts, hands smoothing over the skirts and catching on something as her fingers slip into a gap on the side and Julie feels her eyes widen, a laugh bubbling past her lips as her other hand finds the same slit on the other side, “<em>Oh!</em> Flynn! It’s got pockets!”</p>
<p>“No way,” Flynn moves quickly over to her, her own hand following after Julie’s into the pockets with a wide smile, before letting out a small whine and pout, “I want pockets too!”</p>
<p>“I’m sure our very helpful friend Andrea would be happy to sell you a new dress too,” Julie replies helpfully, wiggling her fingers in the pockets and happy to know she wouldn’t the only one today possibly being conned on dress prices as Flynn points at her once before turning towards the covered entrance to stick her head out.</p>
<p>An hour later Julie is biting her lip in concentration as she ties off the last ribbon in Flynn’s hair, the bright yellow going with the yellow and brown dress that Andrea had pulled out for her-- with <em>pockets! </em>-- and matching the small birds embroidered along the bodice.</p>
<p>“And...done!” She declares, stepping back to admire her work. And, okay it was <em>far </em>from perfect, but she’d managed to twist and braid together the hair and pull it back off her face, securing it at the back of her head like Julie remembers her mother wearing her when she was little.</p>
<p>And Julie knows it’s a little childish in comparison to the way Flynn has managed to twist her hair into a complicated sounding knot at the back of her head that allows only a few stray curls to escape and frame her face. But it’s the first time she’s ever done someone else's hair -- that someone has even allowed her the opportunity -- so she’s going to be proud of it.</p>
<p>“How do we look?” Flynn asks, looping her arm through hers as she turns them to face Andrea who’s been watching them with amusement for the last twenty minutes, offering unsolicited advice the whole time. Julie would have been more annoyed if they hadn’t been in her tent and if she hadn’t suggested they weave small flowers against the ribbons in their hair to add a ‘little extra something’ as she’d put it.</p>
<p>“A far cry from plain,” she grins, dropping one eye in a wink at Julie as she flushes slightly. Apparently she hadn’t managed to keep her offence early completely off her face.</p>
<p>“Thank you,” Julie dips her head a little with a smile, wondering if they should give her more money or offer her something in return for her help. But before she can suggest anything Andrea is waving her hands in the air, one shoulder shrugging.</p>
<p>“Don’t mention it, I’ll see you at the fire tonight for a little fun.”</p>
<p>Neither Julie or Flynn have the chance to ask what <em>that </em>means before the brunette is ushering them out of their tent and back into blinding daylight. Julie hadn’t realised how long they’d been in the tent for until she could see the sun starting on its slow descent back to bed.</p>
<hr/>
<p>“Is there something on my face?” Julie snaps after the third time she catches Luke looking at her.</p>
<p>In the time it had taken herself and Flynn to buy and change into new clothes the boys had managed to find a spot for them to sleep and fed Bridget slices of apple.</p>
<p>They’d made no move of setting up a fire or laying out their beds. When they’d asked what they’d spent all their time doing Alex was the only one who had looked slightly guilty and even Reggie had made some half-hearted excuse.</p>
<p>All Luke had done was <em>look</em> at her. She’d given him all for thirty seconds to say something but when his eyes had just stayed locked on her dress, on her shoulders, she had huffed, brushing past him to do the job herself.</p>
<p>And now he was still staring. Julie wasn’t normally one to be overly self-conscious about her looks or her clothes, but he was starting to make her feel like she’d done something wrong.</p>
<p>“I--” he starts, clears his throat and Julie watches his tongue wet his lips before darting back up to his eyes, “No, nothing I just. You um, you look...nice?” He has one hand rubbing at the back of his neck as he frowns, like he’s not sure what words just left his mouth.</p>
<p>“You don’t sound so sure about that,” she points out. Not that it <em>matters </em>if Luke of all people thinks she looks nice but… well Julie is secure enough to admit she likes it when people compliment her. And, after this morning, she's willing to admit she wants Luke to think she looks nice. </p>
<p>Luke blinks, his eyes gliding over her from head to toe as she stands on the opposite side of their unlit fire –– one of these days she's going to stop and think about <em>why</em> they always seem to be stood on opposite sides of a fire and what it might mean, but today isn't the day for that –– and she thinks she might imagine the way his eyes seem to linger just a little longer on her bare shoulders, <em>again</em>, because then he’s looking at her face. Hand dropping from his neck and that annoying half smile of his back on his face.</p>
<p>“No, I’m sure about it. You look nice.” His eyes sweep over her again, just once, before he turns away to help Willie with something, leaving her staring after him, lips slightly parted and cheeks heating from his last look.</p>
<p>It takes Alex calling her name for her to breath out, trying desperately to swallow with her mouth suddenly feeling to dry before answering. She shoots a glare at Luke’s retreating back before spinning on her heel to help Alex, and if he notices her flushed cheeks or the way she keeps occasionally glaring at his friend, he doesn’t mention it. Though he does look faintly amused.</p>
<hr/>
<p>They wait until they notice other people wandering towards the main campfire in the centre of the clearing with the sun starting to set behind them, the six of them sharing looks and shoulder shrugging. Do they just… walk over? Wait to be invited? Should they take their own plates?</p>
<p>“You guys coming?” Nick’s voice cuts through their silent looks as he slows his walk past them.</p>
<p>“Oh,”Julie looks up at him and back to the others, electing to ignore the frown on Luke’s face and focus on the nods coming from the others, “Yes we were just…well it doesn’t matter.” Julie drops the blanket she had been folding and refolding for the last five minutes and pushes herself up to her feet, dusting off her skirt and falling into step next to Nick. She’s sure the others won't be far behind.</p>
<p>“I see Andrea got you and your friend sorted?” He asks, eyeing her new clothes and Julie smiles, clasping her hands together as she walks.</p>
<p>“She was very helpful. Thank you for pointing us in her direction.”</p>
<p>The closer they get to the fire the more the air starts to smell of cooking meat and spices enough to make her stomach groan in anticipation. Julie doesn’t know if she has ever been so excited for a meal before. When they’re still on the outside of the semicircle of gathered travellers Julie gently places a hand on Nick's arm, glancing up at him with one raised brow, “Were we supposed to um bring anything? Because I think all we have is apples and some dried meat.”</p>
<p>“No,” he chuckles, one hand coming up to pat the one on his arm and then awkwardly changes the angle until their arms are linked and he’s leading her forwards. All Julie can do is blink back her surprise and follow.</p>
<p>He introduces her to the lady serving the food, and introduces her to even more people as he leads her to an empty space on the mismatch of benches and logs. Julie knows she must have responded and smiled and made idle small talk, but all she can really focus on is the plate of hot food in her hands that seems to smell nicer the longer she holds it. It’s very sweet of Nick to take such care in showing them around but all she wants to do is <em>eat</em>.</p>
<p>With Nick on one side of her and Flynn on the other Julie doesn’t spare another moment to wonder about the boys before she’s digging into her food, not even embarrassed by the noise of delight she lets out when it seems to be echoed by Flynn moments later.</p>
<p>Julie loses track of what goes on for a while as she eats. She knows there’s conversation going on around her, that questions are being asked and her friends are answering. There’s talk of how they’re traveling to Stornoway where they kick off their traveling performance each year, which explains all the bright colours of their tents and caravans and the wide selection of clothes that Andrea had.</p>
<p>She had always looked forward to when the traveling shows came to her kingdom, her father would always make sure they were the last stop before they headed to the next one. She liked watching them twirl in their bright skirts and how the stories they told always ended in a kiss and walking into a painted sunset.</p>
<p>Idly, as she dabs the last part of her bread into the juices on her plate, Julie wonders if her father will still schedule them to play this year now she’s not there. Carlos had always liked it too, but she knows he did it mostly for her. To see her smile and try to copy their dances for weeks afterwards. With a small frown, she really hopes she hasn’t ruined it for everyone else.</p>
<p>“So how long ‘ave you two been together?” The question has her blinking out of her thoughts as she follows everyone's line of sight to where Alex has Fredrick bundled up in a blanket on his knee while Willie tears up scraps of meat to hand feed him.</p>
<p>She tilts her head, a curious smile on her face as Alex seems to realise everyone is not looking at them if the sudden flush to his cheeks is any indication, but he huffs out a laugh as he looks at Willie, eyebrows raised in some silent question. And secretly, Julie is glad someone has asked because she's been wondering too, but had been unsure how best to broach the topic. </p>
<p>“Officially we call it two years,” Willie says, pointedly ignoring the snort of laughter that comes from Reggie even as Alex tries to throw a bit of wood at him. “But we uh -- had moments before that that makes these two--” he draws a circle in the air around Reggie and Luke who do nothing but smile prettily, “like to class as us being together. But it’s not their relationship so <em>they </em>don't get a say.”</p>
<p>Reggie leans forward, elbows on his knees and pitches his voice down, as if he’s going to tell everyone a secret, “They just don’t want to admit that neither of them would have made a move if it wasn’t for me and Luke <em>accidentally </em>telling Alex the wrong time one day for when we were supposed to meet for...something.”</p>
<p>“That’s a complete lie!” Alex exclaims, and Julie’s pretty sure the only reason he doesn’t get up is because of the kitten on his lap, “I was just...biding my time. Waiting for the right moment strike up a conversation that would lead into asking him out for dinner.”</p>
<p>“You were going to ask me for dinner?” Willie asks, a grin pulling at his lips as he looks at Alex like it’s brand new information.</p>
<p>“Until you knocked me down with that fence post at which point I considered calling someone to get you arrested,” he mutters, but there’s such <em>light </em>in his eyes that she can see even from here and it would be impossible to miss the joy of Willie’s laugh in response.</p>
<p>“When we got there an hour later the two of them were sitting by the river so busy talking they didn’t even notice us calling them,” Luke says with a roll of his eyes, “They’ve been pretty inseparable ever since. Which is good, because Willie always knows how to get us out of trouble.”</p>
<p>This time it’s Alex rolling his eyes as he looks over at Luke with a half-hearted glare, “You really need to stop using my boyfriend to get out of trouble.”</p>
<p>“Better yet, stop getting into trouble,” she can’t help but but in, raising an eyebrow at the offended look Luke shoots her way, and she might have felt more embarrassed about intruding on the conversation if Alex didn’t burst out laughing and Willie didn’t throw a wide smile her way.</p>
<p>“She has a point,” Reggie agrees as he leans slightly into Luke and nodded at her, which just makes him pout a little more and slump his shoulders.</p>
<p>“Pretty sure it’s illegal to talk to me like that,” he mutters to his plate. Or that’s what Julie <em>thinks </em>he mutters at least, but that doesn’t make much sense. Why would it ever be <em>illegal </em>to insult or tease him?</p>
<p>She must have misheard him, she decides, redirecting her attention back to the conversation as Alex explains why the cat currently has four names. Happy to pick her earlier argument about why Fluffball is silly. </p>
<hr/>
<p>The sun has fully set and the star have come out in the sky when someone pulls out a guitar a little while after they’ve all finished eating. The first unrelated notes catching everyone's attention and it must me some type of signal Julie thinks because then someone else is pulling another guitar out and passing it to someone next to them and someone else has a fiddle and the brunette who had helped her with her dress shakes a tambourine in Luke's face as she moves past them in a whirl of skirts and smiles. Julie sits up a little straighter as she watches them arrange themselves, the makeshift band on their makeshift stage, intrigued about what they might be about to play. She can see Luke from the corner of her eye leaning forward too.</p>
<p>Reggie’s eyes widen a fraction in recognition of what they start playing after the first few notes, his foot tapping along as his head bobs up and down with a grin.</p>
<p>He stands up and turns towards Flynn, dropping into an exaggerated bow as he offers her his hand, “Care to dance?”</p>
<p>“Always,” she smiles, fingers wrapping around his hand and Flynn’s laugh is infectious as Reggie pulls her to her feet, spinning her around past the fire and into the small clearing where others are already gathering.</p>
<p>Julie watches with a soft smile as Willie stands up next, holding a hand out to Alex with what she assumes is his sweetest smile, eyebrows quirking as the blonde just rolls his eyes, carefully depositing Oak Leaf in his bundled up blanket on the ground, and accepts the hand up as the music starts in earnest, the two of them joining Flynn and Reggie who are still spinning around the make-shift dance area. If there’s a dance to this song, she’s pretty sure none of them are doing it right. But she thinks that might be the point.</p>
<p>Unrestrained dancing under the stars.</p>
<p>The brunette, Andrea, starts singing some song that Julie has never heard before but is bright and clear and has even those of them not dancing tapping their feet along. Luke looks over at her, eyes a little wide with a half smile on his face as if he’s about to ask her something when a shadow falls over her and Julie blinks up to see Nick.</p>
<p>“Would you like to dance?” He asks, one hand reaching out to her while his other is gesturing behind him.</p>
<p>“Oh, um,” her eyes glance quickly back to Luke but he’s already turned away, lips pressed into a line as he looks straight ahead and Julie stops herself from rolling her eyes as she looks back at Nick with a polite smile.</p>
<p>“I’d love to. Though I don’t think I know this dance,” she confesses with a light laugh, accepting his hand and standing up.</p>
<p>“That’s alright, you don’t have to be a good dancer for this,” he says easily as he leads her past the fire and into a space near Flynn and Reggie who are bright eyed with laughter. Seeing her friends so happy is almost enough to distract her from Nick’s words. She never said she wasn’t a good dancer, and she’s a little insulted he’d assumes she was.</p>
<p>“You just have to move your feet!” Flynn calls over to her, nodding down at the ground where Julie can see her and Reggie doing completely different moves but following the same rhythm.</p>
<p>So Julie closes her eyes, waits for a heart beat, two, until she can follow it, can <em>feel </em>it. With Nick still holding one hand, Reggie takes her other and then they are all turning, jumping and stepping forwards and backwards in time with the music but completely different to everyone around them. A delighted laugh bubbles past her lips as they start moving faster, Flynn and Reggie’s hands breaking apart only to allow Alex and Willie to join their circle.</p>
<p>Julie doesn’t know what the words to the songs are, doesn’t think she’s ever even heard them before, doesn’t even know how long they dance <em>for</em>, but that doesn’t matter.</p>
<p>As she laughs, jumping slightly out of time with her friends in a circle, she feels more alive then she has in such a long time. She wonders if this is what it feels like to be drunk. To feel so alive yet unaware of so much going on around her at the same time. The song seems to hit the chorus again as Reggie tugs her hand upwards and spins her forwards into the centre of their circle. Her feet moving without her needing to tell them too and she spins and spins, head thrown back to see the star littered sky shining down on her.</p>
<p>It’s as she comes to a slow stop, feet on the ground but head still spinning that her eyes lock on Luke’s across the clearing and everything seems to fade out of focus but him.</p>
<p>She’s too far away to see his face clearly, just his eyes through the flickering flames and the way his lips are curled into a smile different from any she’s seen on him before. A slow smile spreads across her own face and she nods her head at him, at their friends in a silent question.</p>
<p>For a heartbeat Julie doesn’t think he’s going to accept, thinks he’s going to stay there; so close yet so far away. And then he’s standing up, pushing the sleeves of his shirt up his forearms as he walks towards them.</p>
<p>And maybe it’s fate, deciding to intervene again, because the song ends and the tempo slows into something a little softer, a little sadder, just as he reaches them. Their circle breaks into pairs again, and Julie can see Nick about to step forwards, to ask her to dance again and she panics, for a heartbeat not knowing how she’ll be able to politely decline his offer.</p>
<p>And then Luke is in front of her. So close she can feel the heat radiating off of him. Looking down at her with eyes that still hide so many secrets, but she can’t find it in herself to mind right now. Not when he’s holding out a hand to her, eyebrow quirked in question with his <em>infuriating </em>smile.</p>
<p>And Julie doesn’t even think to spare a glance at Nick as she puts her hand in Luke’s, his longer fingers curling around her hand, calluses rough against her skin and pulling her towards him. One hand drops to her waist and she puts hers on his shoulder as they slowly start to move.</p>
<p>“Hello,” she says quietly, because she feels like she needs to do something to fill the silence between them and to distract herself from how she can feel his fingers flex on her waist as Nick moves past them. On how intensely he's looking at her.</p>
<p>“Hi,” he breaths back, peering down at her carefully and she wonders what he’s thinking as he looks at her. What he sees.</p>
<p>“I didn’t think you’d know how to dance,” she confesses as he spins them around (and once again Julie knows this isn’t the dance for this song, that everyone around them seems to be doing something different but for once she doesn’t really mind), following the simple steps of a waltz.</p>
<p>“I take great offence at that,” he mutters, eyes squinting a little as he looks at her and, as if to prove her wrong, he releases his grip on her waist and tightens the one on her hand, and spins her out, her skirts twisting around her legs in flashes before pulling her back in smoothly. Julie’s hand thumps against his chest as she falls back into his space, his spare one coming up to rest on her shoulder to steady her as he grins, feeling a little breathless and dizzy as she laughs. From the spinning. Not from the way he's looking at her. She'll be adamant about that.</p>
<p>“Okay, I was wrong!”</p>
<p>Luke lets out a little hum, his lips pulling into that <em>damn</em> smile of his as he trails his hand across the bare skin of her shoulder and down her back, leaving goosebumps in his wake until he has one arm wrapped around her back. In the back of her mind Julie knows that in the Before of her life, dancing like this with someone would be seen as wrong. They’re standing too close, their touches too casual and yet, she wants him closer. Wants to know what his calluses feel like brushing across her cheeks.</p>
<p>She lets both her hands move from his shoulder and chest to around his neck, linking her fingers together to stop herself from doing something silly like running her fingers through his hair like he’s constantly doing.</p>
<p>Standing this close, Julie lets her eyes trace across his face without worry, she doesn't really have anywhere else to look after all. At the stubble she can see on his cheeks, at the small flecks of gold in his eyes, at the way one side of his mouth curls up into a smile before the other.</p>
<p>“I never doubted you could dance,” he says quietly and Julie holds his eyes despite the fact she can feel her cheeks heating under his gaze.</p>
<p>“You’ve barely seen me dance,” she counters because it’s true. All she’d really been doing was twirling and laughing, that was hardly what she’d class as dancing.</p>
<p>“I saw enough.” And she’s close enough to see his eyes dip to her lips briefly before back up to her eyes, his breath fanning across her face as he breathes out.</p>
<p>Julie doesn’t have a response to that that wouldn't get her in trouble so she does something brave and steps a little closer and lets her head rest against his shoulder as they continue to sway slowly in a circle. She can feel his heart beating like this, can smell the last clinging remnants of something floral on his shirt mixed with sweat from all their many days of walking.</p>
<p>
  <em>And you haven't moved an inch</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Such that I would not know</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>If you sleep always like this</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>The flesh calmly going cold</em>
</p>
<p>“This is a sad song,” she says quietly, lifting her head to look up at him again to see if he’s noticed too, and he’s already looking down at her, eyes impossibly soft.</p>
<p>“Mhm,” he wets his lips before lowering his head to sing into her ear, breath tickling her skin and making her shiver, “<em>We lay here for years or for hours, your hand in my hand, so still and discreet, so long we become the flowers</em>.”</p>
<p>She’s heard him sing in little bursts and moments since that first time as they walked side by side a few weeks ago, but each time it still takes her breath away a little. There’s very few people, she thinks, who can convey so much with so little words sung. Julie's constantly wondering what he sounds like when he <em>fully </em>sings. What they sound like when the play together.</p>
<p>“I think you’re going to do amazing in Marrae,” she smiles at him, her smile widening at his look of surprise.</p>
<p>“Really?”</p>
<p>“If you can play half as well as you sing you’re going to blow everyone away,” she says and, because she can’t help but tease, “Unless you spend too much time talking to them and they realise how <em>annoying </em>you are.”</p>
<p>Luke shakes his head at her as he chuckles, teeth biting down on his bottom lip as he clearly tries not to smile at her words, and his fingers dig a little into the small of her back in retaliation and Julie holds her breath to see what he’s going to say in response. She wonders if it’s normal to wait with baited breath for someone to reply to your teasing comments. There was nothing about it in the fairy tales she used to read. </p>
<p>“Julie, there’s… there’s something I need to tell you,” he starts, eyes roaming across her face for something, and she doesn’t mean too, but she inches forward a little too––</p>
<p>“Guys!” Reggie’s voice cuts through the bubble Julie hadn’t even realised they’d created and her hands drop away from Luke’s neck as his fall from around her waist, the two of them stepping away too quickly to seem casual, and the second they’re no longer touching Julie misses him. If Reggie notices the flush in her cheeks or the way Luke is rubbing at the back of his neck, he doesn’t say anything. Far too excited about something else. Tents, apparently.</p>
<p>At any other time she’d probably be just as excited, but right now all she wants is to go back in time thirty seconds when she was still in Luke’s arms.</p>
<p>Blinking quickly, she swallows and looks at Reggie, trying to desperately to concentrate on what he’s saying.</p>
<p>“This man over there, Edgar, he says he’s got two tents he can sell us! They’re blue!”</p>
<p>Edgar. <em>Luke’s fingers on her shoulders</em>. Tents. <em>Luke’s arms around her</em>. Blue tents. <em>Luke's breath ghosting across her cheek</em>.</p>
<p>She lets her nails dig into the palm of her hand and forces what she hopes is a normal smile on her face as she looks at Reggie, hoping her voice isn't as breathless as she suddenly feels “Well, lead the way. I’d quite like a tent to sleep in.”</p>
<p>She looks at Luke once, his eyes already on her with a small smile as he gestures for her to go first, head dipping slightly in a way she’s seen countless men at court do before.</p>
<p>They had been having a <em>moment </em>there.</p>
<p>And she didn’t know what any of it meant, or what he was going to say, but she knows the moment is over and she’ll be spending the rest of the evening wondering what would have happened if Reggie hadn’t interrupted. Wondering what he needed to tell her.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>i just. really had a fun time writing this chapter so i really hope you all enjoyed it!! fun fact, they accidentally started doing the hokey cokey when i first did the dance scene so if you want to read it imaging that i'd recommend, its pretty funny lmao. also its not reggie's fault he interrupted okay, i had to have him butt in, they were about to kiss and it was too soon!!!!</p>
<p>julies new outfit looks a little something like <a href="https://www.etsy.com/listing/900824462/renaissance-corset-peasant-bodice-in?epik=dj0yJnU9bThQUGg4NV9ycUxFb3ppS21VUTB5ckFkS0VWUTBZV2wmcD0wJm49M1pYeV9RUjRkZEs2b0FLYmt5YTZkQSZ0PUFBQUFBR0JTVlFV">this</a> btw</p>
<p>the song is <i>In a Week</i> by Hozier </p>
<p>anyway!!! thank you for all the lovely comments so far!! i'm so glad people are like this 💜<br/>i hope you're all staying safe in these hard times.<br/>hope you enjoyed! comments and kudos are appreciated!! mwah xox<br/>you can also find me on <a href="https://tangledstarlight.tumblr.com/"></a>tumblr where i post vague writing updates of me slowly loosing the plot!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. chapter 6</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>there's a pov change in this chapter so we're getting a little bit of Luke's thoughts. </p><p><b><i>trigger warnings!!!</i></b> swearing, weapon mentions and mentions of blood.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    
<p></p><blockquote>
  <p>
    <strike>
      <em>once upon a time there was a boy who ran away from home and dreamt of something more, who ran away from his mistakes, who wished his friends weren’t always right...</em>
    </strike>
  </p>
</blockquote><hr/><p>“So,” Reggie starts as he sits down, shoulder bumping lightly against his as he passes him a bowl of what Luke thinks is supposed to be porridge and wiggles his eyebrows at him, “You and Julie looked like you were having fun last night.”</p><p>“We were just dancing, you have to stand close for those types of dances,” he’s quick to reply. Probably too quick if the look Reggie shoots at Alex is anything to go by. And it’s the last thing he needs, Alex and Reggie pointing out how close the two of them were and how it was dangerous and stupid and—</p><p>“I never said <em>close</em>. I said <em>fun</em>,” Reggie says, enunciating the two words and Luke knows he’s messed up. So he does the most logical thing in that moment, he shovels as much of the porridge as he can into his mouth and avoids eye contact with either of his friends. He can hear his mother’s voice in the back of his head, chiding him about manners and etiquette and all the other things he hated.</p><p>Hated so much he ran away. Left in the night without saying goodbye. Sometimes he wonders how long it took before his parents realised he was gone, before they realised he hadn’t just left early to avoid his duties but had left and wasn’t coming back. He can’t spend too long wandering down those paths because if he does he starts to picture his mothers face, the disappointment he’d grown so used to in her eyes, the way her lips would purse when she tried not to cry, the way his father would place a hand on her back and gently lead her out of his empty room.</p><p>“Which one of you set him off?” Willie’s voice cuts through the fog in his mind and Luke blinks to clear it in time to see the other man sitting down next to Alex with something that looks a lot more appetising than porridge.</p><p>“We were just talking about how he and Julie were having <em>fun </em>last night, after he got jealous of Nick” Reggie says, nudging his shoulder again but where he’d been all playful eyebrows and teasing grins he’s now raising only one and peering at him in concern.</p><p>“We were <em>just</em> dancing,” he says quickly, trying to stress the word as much as he can before looking quickly at Willie, “And I’m fine. I was just thinking about how one of us really needs to learn how to cook.”</p><p>It gets the reaction he expects it too, the same one it’s received every time one of them has mentioned how bad they all are at cooking. Reggie makes a noncommittal sound, Willie heaves out a sigh and Alex starts stuttering in outrage.</p><p>And it’s enough for them to stop looking at him as they bicker amongst themselves and for Luke to think about what Reggie had said.</p><p>About dancing and having fun and <em>Julie</em>.</p><p>He stirs his spoon through the porridge, half listening as Alex explains their food would taste as good as last nights if one of them had thought to buy spices, but honestly all he can remember about last night is how pretty Julie had looked in the firelight. How her eyes had seemed to sparkle as she’d laughed at whatever that dopey blonde had been saying. He likes to think they’d shined a little brighter the second she was dancing with him though.</p><p>He had danced with a lot of people in his life but spinning around a fire in a forest with Julie in his arms had been like nothing he’d ever felt before.</p><p>If he closed his eyes and concentrated he could still smell the flowers that had been in her hair, still feel how soft her skin had felt under his hands — and Luke had never been so glad for the darkness of night so that the boys couldn’t see how long it had taken him to fall asleep last night as he replayed every moment of those dances over in his mind. Wanting to remember it all.</p><p>And if Reggie hadn’t have interrupted he probably would have confessed every secret he’d been holding on to for the last three weeks. Longer even. Luke still wasn’t sure if he was glad of Reggie’s untimely arrival or not. Telling Julie the truth might not have been his best idea but at least then the air between them all would be clear and— well if she had still liked him afterwards at least it would have been <em>him </em>she liked and not just who she thought he was. Not that he was much different. At least he didn’t <em>think </em>he was much different.</p><p><em>Was </em>he different? Luke frowned, hand pausing his stirring and looking up at his friends glancing between them all and, before he could blurt out his question, his eyes land on Flynn who’s stroking a purring Fluffball in her lap, who had sat down sometime while he’d been lost in his thoughts. Which just meant a completely different question left his lips instead.</p><p>“Where’s Julie?” He shoves a spoonful of porridge into this mouth as quick as he can. But it’s not enough to miss the slightly exasperated look that Flynn seems to send at Alex before she looks back at him.</p><p>“She’s talking to Nick about the best inns to stop at once we get out of this blasted forest. He apparently has a list of them in his tent that he wanted to give her,” she says lightly, fingers still gently stroking between the cats ears and Luke sits up, shoulders thrown back as he frowns.</p><p>“You just let her go off with him alone? He might be a murder for all we know!”</p><p>“Nick is not a murder,” Flynn scoffs and Luke watches as Fluffball lets out a small mewl of protest at her fingers that had stopped running over his head while Flynn had rolled her eyes, “They’re just talking. Much like how the two of you were <em>just</em> dancing last night.” There’s a smile on the other girl's face that makes Luke think he missed out on an important part of the conversation while he was lost in his thoughts.</p><p>“I’m going to go check on her. We don’t know these people,” he mutters and consciously ignores the way Flynn rolls her eyes and the way Reggie is clearly trying not to laugh at him. Perhaps when they get out of this forest he’ll make plans to find some new friends who won't laugh at him.</p><p>“Luke,” Alex starts, but Luke waves a hand at him, already standing up and walking away. Logically, he knows Julie is probably fine. She’s more than capable of looking after herself. He had a bruise on his cheek for four days to prove it. But what kind of pri—<em>man</em> would he be if he didn’t check, just in case? And perhaps he had other reasons for wanting to find her too. Like finishing an interrupted conversation.</p><p>Finding Nick’s tent isn’t hard, he’d walked past it a few times yesterday after Julie and Flynn had gone to inquire about new dresses and he and the boys had taken extra care to pick the perfect spot to set up for the night. Luke’s criteria had been as far away from Nick’s tent as they could get. Reggie’s had been closest to the caravan with the dancers. Alex’s had been near the fire so they wouldn’t have to light one themselves. Willie had said there was only one spot left and they had no choice.</p><p>The thing is, Luke doesn’t really know why he doesn’t like Nick. He had been nothing but pleasant and helpful since the moment they had met him. Inviting them for dinner, directing them to the people who would sell them more food, making an incredible first impression. Which, Luke was big enough to admit, might have been part of his problem with him.</p><p>Nick had swooped in and saved Julie from falling.</p><p>Luke had restrained her and stolen from her.</p><p>He had never made a worst first impression with someone.</p><p>But they were okay. He’d made up for it. At least, Luke had thought he’d made up for it. Then Nick had come along and Julie had been making eyes at him and dancing with him and — god maybe Reggie was right. He <em>was </em>jealous. He wrinkles his nose at the thought as he approaches the dark grey tent, dragging his feet a little to prolong the walk now he was close and was starting to worry. Did Julie think he was jealous of Nick? Why was he even jealous in the first place!</p><p>He was funnier and had better friends and <em>much </em>better hair and he and Julie were friends. And if Julie knew <em>everything</em> about him there was no chance she’d even look twice at <em>Nick</em>.</p><p>So he runs a hand through his hair and glances down at his shirt, checks it’s tucked in just enough to appear casual, and walks into the tent.</p><p>And almost turns around and walks right back out of it.</p><p>They’re both sitting on one side of the small table that Nick has set up in the tent, heads both bent over a map and Julie is glancing up at Nick with a small smile that he’s never seen on her face before. It’s soft and gentle. The kind of smile he’s fairly certain you give people who make you happy. Luke doesn’t think she’s ever smiled at him like that and he refuses to examine why that thought hurts so much. Not right now at least.</p><p>For a moment Luke just watches them. The easy smile on Julie’s face — she’s wearing her hair half up today, he notices, tied back from her face with one of the pretty ribbons he’s seen in her bag that matches some of the flowers on her new dress — and the way Nick laughs too loudly at something she’s said. Trying to impress her, Luke is sure. He’s known a lot of people like that, who see a pretty girl and think that laughing at her jokes and saving her the best place at the fire is the way to win her over.</p><p>Either he rolled his eyes loud enough to make a sound or they just finally notice his presence blocking out the light because Nick is looking up at him, eyes a little wide and Julie follows his gaze. And her smile shifts, it’s minuscule and if he hadn’t just seen the way she was smiling at Nick he probably wouldn’t have noticed, but her lips pull up a little higher and he catches a flash of her teeth.</p><p>“Luke!”</p><p>He doesn’t think he’s ever liked the sound of his name in someone's voice as much. But she's still sitting next to Nick at a too small table, and he can still see their heads almost touching as they peered at the a map, how she had been looking at Nick only moments ago. Perhaps this is just how Julie is with people. Happy and friendly and glad to lean in close when you dance with her. Perhaps she wasn’t even planning on coming with them any more, happy to stay here with her new blonde friend. It was probably good that Reggie had interrupted them before he could have said anything that got them in trouble.</p><p>“Willie says we should have been packed up and gone an hour ago. At this rate we’ll be lucky to find a decent place to set up camp before night fall. Unless you’ve had a better offer then continuing on with us?” He doesn’t mean to sound so snappy; except he does nothing to soften his tone either.</p><p>A frown replaces the smile on her face, her brows furrowing and Luke can tell she’s about to say something, to snap back at him, but he doesn’t want to hear whatever it is. Not right now.</p><p>“If you’re still coming with us we’re leaving in an hour,” he shoots a nod at Nick, glances quickly at Julie and then turns to walk away.</p><p>It’s not until he’s back at their tent and hurrying the others into moving that he has a moment to realise just what he’s done and how badly he’s probably fucked up. But well, he can't exactly back down now, can he?</p>
<hr/><p>“So talk me through your thought process here,” Alex says, glancing at him once just to check he’s paying attention before turning back to their job of filling up the water skins, “You basically told Julie to pick between leaving with us or being left behind and have now decided to avoid her because— why exactly are you avoiding her?”</p><p>For a moment Luke seriously considers just pretending he hasn’t heard his friends question. He’d done it before and gotten away with it. He could act as if the rushing water of the stream was too loud, there was a chance Alex wouldn’t push. He never really had before. Though, he supposes he couldn't really push him before. So instead Luke heaves a sigh and sits back on his heels, dropping the half full water skin next to him, idly watching as water leaks out and travels down back to the stream.</p><p>“I just— I almost told her who I am last night, and about the bandits and everything, and I probably would have had Reggie not barged in about tents,” he shakes his head and lets out a laugh that sounds bitter even to him, “Though it’s probably a good job I didn’t. Because I remembered this morning that we’ll be going our separate ways as soon as we reach Marrae and she was smiling at Nick.”</p><p>Alex is quiet for so long that Luke chances a glance over at him only to find the blonde just openly gaping at him, water running down his arm from how hard he has suddenly squeezed the water skin. Luke hadn’t expected him have such a strong reaction to his words, but he’s glad that he see’s how bad—</p><p>“Sorry. Did you just say you’re planning on avoiding Julie for the rest of this journey because she <em>smiled at Nick</em>?”</p><p>Well, when it’s put like <em>that </em>Luke can see why it might sound stupid.</p><p>“You didn’t see the way she smiled at him! It was...all soft and if she likes him I think she should go on with them,” he shrugs one shoulder and picks at a frayed hem on his shirt, avoiding eye contact with Alex.</p><p>“Lucas you are <em>jealous </em>and incredibly dumb,” Alex mutters, finally seeming to notice the water running down his forearm as the water skin falls to one of the rocks and Luke sucks in a breath as a wet arm is wiped across his shoulder.</p><p>“Oi!” He leans sideways, trying to avoid a further attack and glares at Alex who just shakes his head at him.</p><p>“Perhaps she smiled at him this morning but it’s <em>you </em>she was dancing with half the night and I highly doubt she was looking at Nick the same way.”</p><p>“You don’t know what, you didn’t see the way she was smiling at him.”</p><p>“No, but I’ve seen the way she smiles at <em>you</em>. We all have. And I’m fairly certain it wasn’t the way she was smiling at Nick.” The look that Alex shoots at him is one he’s seen many times over the years. It’s the look that says he’s missing an important piece of information about something.</p><p>But Luke doesn’t know what to do with that look in this context because Julie has never looked at him the way she was looking at Nick in that tent. Whenever she looked at him, smiled at him it was… different. Though he didn’t know what the others were seeing to think that when she smiled at him it was any different to when she smiled at them.</p><p>(He was steadfastly ignoring a memory of the night before, of Julie laughing as he had spun her, of the way her eyes had crinkled a little at the corners, of the simple joy radiating from her. She had smiled at him last night and Luke had felt something shift into place into his heart that he hadn’t even realised was out of place.)</p><p>“You’re wrong, she doesn’t look at me any different to any of you,” he shakes his head at Alex and moves to pick up his abandoned water skin again. Only Alex’s still damp hand comes down to cover his before he can reach to start refilling it and Luke raises an eyebrow at him.</p><p>“I say this as someone who has known you practically our whole lives and who thinks of you as a brother,” Alex angles his head so Luke can’t avoid his eyes as he says his next words, “I love you dearly, but Lucas, you are so incredibly dumb sometimes it’s enough to make me want to drown you.”</p><p>Luke blinks at him, eyes darting quickly towards the stream as he tries to decide if it’s deep enough to <em>drown </em>someone in before going back to Alex who is still looking at him.</p><p>“Um,” he starts, free hand moving to rub at the back of his neck but it’s as far as he gets before Alex pats his hand once and smiles at him. Which might have been more reassuring had he not mentioned wanting to <em>drown</em> him on occasion.</p><p>“You can’t avoid her for the rest of the journey is all I’m going to say.”</p><p>Well, he could certainly <em>try</em>.</p>
<hr/><p>When he had first told Alex and Reggie that he was planning on leaving home, on running away, it had just been so they wouldn’t worry he had been kidnapped. It had never been because he expected them to leave with him. They both had lives of their own, responsibilities they didn’t mind, people they would miss.</p><p>And then Alex had shown up in his rooms with a list written in his neat handwriting for things they were going to need and a calendar to pick a date when the moon wasn’t full, with Reggie following behind with an assortment of bags and a map of the continent. And he had never loved them more.</p><p>He can still picture the scene if he concentrates. The half-hearted argument Luke had made about them not needing to follow him. The impassioned speech Reggie had given about friendship and brothers and sticking together. The way Alex had already talked Willie into coming with them. Luke had been prepared to leave by himself, to walk away and not look back. But he can’t deny he’s happy that his friends decided to come with him. He’ll always be especially grateful that Willie loved Alex enough to give up his life to follow them. Because honestly, they wouldn’t have survived without him. Those first few days after they’d left had been <em>rough</em> and Luke’s fairly sure they’d have been worse if Willie hadn’t been there to steer them away from poisoned berries and out of a bear’s cave.</p><p>Right now however, Luke has never regretted him coming along more.</p><p>“Julie, Luke, can you two collect some firewood?” There’s a slight gleam in his eyes as he looks between the two of them, clearly noting the distances Luke has been trying to keep all day, and deciding to ignore it. Maybe he would beat Alex to it and just drown all three of his friends.</p><p>“Of course we can,” Julie replies and there’s a forced smile on her face as she looks over at him, a single eyebrow raised as if challenging him to back down. Which he would take offence too if he hadn’t been about to shoot a look at Reggie for help. But Reggie is busy brushing down Bridget and Alex is helping Flynn set up the tents and well, he’s always been awfully bad at turning down a challenge. He’s not about to start today.</p><p>“Mhm,” he forces out with a smile that he’s sure matches the one on Julie’s face. If Willie notices — or cares <strong>—</strong> he doesn’t comment, just shoots them a thumbs up and turns to helping Alex and Flynn who are <em>not </em>succeeding with the tent.</p><p>He stalls for as long as he can by fussing with his bag and checking he can’t be of more help with the tent situation, but when Julie pointedly clears her throat behind him, he can’t stall any longer. Gesturing with one arm for her to lead the way Luke doesn’t miss the way she rolls her eyes at him before doing so. It’s almost enough to get him to tease her about it because he’s pretty positive it’s a habit she has picked up from Alex. But he’s trying to avoid her at all costs. Polite responses is all he needs to give.</p><p>They make it all of a dozen steps into the thicker part of the trees, with only three stick in their collection, when Julie rounds on him, jabbing a thin stick into his chest.</p><p>“Why are you avoiding me?” She demands, one hand on her hip while the other shoves the stick into his chest again and it doesn’t exactly <em>hurt </em>but he swats it away anyway.</p><p>“I’m not avoiding you. I’m here right now aren’t I?” he raises an eyebrow at her before moving to step around her.</p><p>Apparently his answer isn’t good enough for Julie because she side steps with him, blocking him which ever way he tries to move and fucking <em>hell</em>, he didn’t know she was so fast.</p><p>“You <em>have </em>been avoiding me, ever since this morning with Nick!”</p><p>Luke gets the feeling that she wants to stamp her foot and the only thing stopping her in that there wouldn’t be a satisfying sound on soil.</p><p>“I <em><strong>demand</strong> </em>you tell me what is going on. What have I done wrong?” She throws her shoulders back and arms at her sides, and even though she barely reaches past his shoulder he almost gives in. And Luke gets the feeling this stance has gotten her her own way a lot. There’s something about the way she said it, <em>demanded </em>it, that niggles at the back of his head. Something strangely familiar.</p><p>“Oh, you <em>demand </em>do you?” he says, taking a half step towards her, only Julie doesn’t step back the way he had expected her to and now they’re standing a lot closer and he's looking down at her and she' tilting her head and it should feel awkward, but it doesn't. They're almost as close as they had been last night and it had felt natural then too, Luke remembers. </p><p>“Yes, I do. If I’ve—” she swallows, and it’s the first time since she jabbed the stick at him that she breaks their eye contact. It’s when Luke notices the way her eyelashes flutter against her cheeks as she blinks once, twice, before looking back at him, wide and open and sad. “If I’ve offended you in some way I would like to know how. And how I can make amends.”</p><p>His eyes roam across her face, and he still doesn’t know what Alex means by the way she smiles at him or what to do with these feelings of jealousy that are festering in his gut. But he knows it’s not Julie’s fault. She can’t help the way she smiles at someone, can’t help that that someone isn’t him.</p><p>“Nothing,” he breathes out as his eyes finish their travels across her cheeks and nose and lips and back to her eyes, “You did nothing wrong. I just— you seemed awfully happy with Nick this morning. I thought you might have preferred to continue traveling with him.”</p><p>“He’s going to Stornoway though,” she tilts her head a little, says the words like it's the most obvious thing, and Luke’s eyes catch on a curl that’s worked it’s way loose of her ribbon and is falling across her cheek (and maybe it’s a way to avoid noticing the way his heart catches on the word Stornoway and feeling of home that accompanies it), and before he can stop himself he’s reaching up to gently brush it away. Julie’s breath hitches, just a little, and if they hadn’t been standing so close he doesn’t think he would have noticed.</p><p>“I’m going to Marrae. It would be awfully silly of me to stay with Nick and the others,” Julie whispers and Luke belatedly realises that his fingertips are still resting against her cheek.</p><p>“I’m sorry I was avoiding you,” he says gently, barely aware of the words leaving his mouth as he focuses on the soft skin on her cheek and how his fingers have slowly started tracing across the bone and down her jaw.</p><p>“So you admit you were avoiding me, huh?” she teases and because his fingers are against her face he can <em>feel </em>the way she smiles, watches her lips part and her eyes light up and — <em>oh</em>.</p><p>Maybe this is what Alex meant.</p><p>But that would mean the others didn’t see Julie smile and feel like they were being shined on by the sun itself. Well, now Luke felt awfully sorry for them to be missing out on such a sight.</p><p>“You were going to tell me something. Last night before Reggie interrupted and this morning when you saw me with Nick,” she says and it’s a hint and an invitation if Luke has ever seen one. And they’re alone out here, with the sun starting to set and their friends not worrying about them yet. It’s probably the best time to tell her.</p><p>“Right, I was I—” he pauses, licks his lips and tries to gather his thoughts as best he can. Where does he even start? “You remember the apples we stole from you and Flynn?”</p><p>“Vividly,” she mutters, eyes squinting a little in a way that he thinks is meant to be threatening but just makes her look cute.</p><p>“Well there was a reason we stole them. Why we...well after me and the boys left the pa— left home we maybe sort of ended up in the wrong crowd for a while. Stealing from you it was—” he cuts himself off at the sound of a branch breaking behind Julie and his eyes look over her head in time to see six shadows emerging from the trees.</p><p>Luke feels dread building in his stomach as the shadows become clearer and he sees two of the shadows are actually four from the way they are holding Flynn and Alex with knives to their throats, hands tied in front of them and gags across their mouths. He catches sight of a blood along Alex's hair line and how Flynn's eyes are wide and searching and more then a little scared.</p><p>His hand drops from Julie’s cheek to her shoulder, his other hand reaching for her waist to pull her behind him as Bobby Wilson steps out of the shadows last with a wide smile on his face and a familiar sword tied at his hip that turns Luke’s blood to ice in his veins.</p><p>“Now, now Luke. Don’t stop on our account. Please, continue your story, we’re awfully interested to see how it goes, aren’t we boys?”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>see there wasn't supposed to be any luke pov in this fic but i was struggling so much with this chapter and this was the only way i could write it, so i hope you don't mind a little change of perspective? also. nothing in this chapter was what i had planned, it really did all just go rouge ghfjds but on the plus side the next chapter should be a lil action packed and i hope i can get out quicker then this one!! </p><p>just want to say such a huge thank you to everyone who's commented and stuff too because you're all amazing and im so glad people are enjoying this self-indulgent fic of mine 💜</p><p>anyway!!!<br/>i hope you're all staying safe in these hard times.<br/>hope you enjoyed! comments and kudos are appreciated!! mwah xox<br/>you can also find me on <a href="https://tangledstarlight.tumblr.com/">tumblr</a> where i post vague writing updates of me slowly loosing the plot!</p>
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